It all started with Truth or Dare
by Leviosa0812
Summary: Kogan. How a little game can turn into something like love. Rating up!
1. Revelation

**Hi, I really don't now how I should do this. I'm kind of nerves, which is weird, because no one knows me around here. This is my very first story and it's not even in my own language. I'm Dutch and English is like my worst enemy so don't be to hard for me, please. I really enjoyed writing this story and the only thing that's left for me is just publish it and see what you all think of it. **

**There are a few thinks I should explain first. The boys drink in this story and they're seventeen. In the Netherlands you're aloud to drink alcohol when you're sixteen years old, so it's really not a big deal here if you do drink. It's possible that you find other things in this story that are very Dutch. Just ask me about it if you don't understand.**

**I could really use someone that can help me with the mistakes I'm obviously going to make and it would be nice if anyone could correct them. **

**We all know, that if I owned Big Time Rush or one of the boys, I wouldn't be writing this story **

**Revelation**

We felt like the luckiest guys in the world. Gustavo gave us a vacation. Six freaking weeks. That god he was tired of having us around all day.

I felt like I died and went to heaven.

To make it even better; Mama Knight and Katie were going home for that time and we had the place all to ourselves.

"Here are the rules boys: No girls in the apartment. No alcohol when I'm not around. No parties. I don't want you to eat junk food every night, you all can cook so be healthy. And last: I want you to call every night at seven, no exceptions" Mama Knight said sternly.

"Of course not, mom. I promise" Kendall said. He crossed his fingers behind his back and I had a hard time trying to stifle my laughter.

"Alright then. Come on, Katie! We have to go, otherwise we'll miss our flight!" She yelled over her shoulder. She gave each of us a hug and walked out the door. A very grumpy Katie followed her. The little girl really didn't want to go back.

We started cheering as soon as the door closed behind them.

"Two weeks of complete freedom!" cried James.

"Gentlemen, I have a few new rules for us: Girls, allowed. Alcohol, allowed. Parties, allowed. Not allowed? Healthy food and being bored for six weeks!" shouted Carlos as he happily fell back on the couch. He didn't bother taking his shoes of since no one was around to shout at him about it.

Kendall was looking out of the window. He followed the taxi with his mother and Katie until it was out of sight. He turned to us with a board grin on his face. I knew that look. He had a plan.

"We have to make this night a one we'll remember forever. This is what we're gonna do; Carlos, you go to the store and buy party food and stuff. James, you and I are going to prepare 2J for a sleepover-party. Logan, you call the girls. And with girls I mean Jo, Camille, Stephanie and Rachel. Nothing big, just a group of friends, but that's perfect for my plan. Get moving!"

At eight, all the girls were here. They were all wearing PJ's and looking hot. We ordered pizza and got pretty tipsy from the beer Carlos bought us. We were all having a crazy fun time.

After two hours of non-stop wrestling and fooling around, we got tired and fell down on the living room floor. James and Kendall found every single pillow, blanket and mattress and brought them to the living room. I thought it looked like an isle of soft things, surrounded by the large orange couch.

"Finally, the moment we've all been waiting for! Truth or Dare!" James said in a low voice.

"Hell yeah!" said Camille and the other girls nodded.

Carlos raised two fingers. "I swear I'll tell nothing but the truth and will do every dare you guys told me to do" His voice was solemn and the girls giggled.

We all followed his example and promised to do whatever you're truth or dare was. James picked up his laptop. "I found a site for this game. In this way you don't know what's going to be asked. You can choose from two types. The first got questions that are quite innocent. The other is way cooler, though. What do we do?"

"The last" Everyone shouted in unison. I laughed nervously. The last time I played Truth or Dare had been pretty tough. I had to lick honey from a girl's stomach. I got a little _problem _after that one. The guys still bullied me with it. That was the main reason I avoided this game as much as possible.

"Who wants to go first?" Kendall asked looking around.

"I'll go! Dare! Bring it on, James!" Carlos said enthusiastically. Of course he would go first. Daredevil.

He sat up straight and stared intently to James who clicked the 'Dare' button on the screen of his laptop. He chuckled. "The person across from you can make you a drink. Everything is allowed."

"Yes!" cried Jo, who jumped up and went straight for the kitchen. She searched for the biggest muck around and turned her back on us, now we couldn't see what she was doing.

"This can't be that bad" Carlos said in a voice that was slightly higher than his normal tone.

Jo came back with a cup in her hands and a big grin on her face. She handed the drink to Carlos and sat back in her seat between me and James.

"What is it?" asked the pretty boy softly.

I leaned in closer so I would her what she said. "A raw egg, syrup, milk and pepper" she whispered. She kept her eyes on Carlos as James and I laughed. He sniffed at it a little before taking a carful sip.

"Oh my gosh! This is disgusting!" He exclaimed before running straight to the bathroom. We heard him rinse his mouth multiple times before finally coming back.

"Who now, Carlos?" Stephanie asked impatiently.

"Rachel" He answered.

"Truth" She said.

"What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done in your life?" James read before looking at her.

"Oh no" She turned red. "I drank water from a toilet once because I wondered how it would taste."

I saw looks of disgust all around the room. I didn't feel much better myself. I heard someone make retching noises.

"Okay. NEXT" James said quickly to change the subject. "Chose someone Rachel."

"Kendall"

"Dare" he said confidently.

James grimaced when he saw the dare on his screen. "Choose someone of the same sex and kiss with him/her for at least 30 seconds. It has to be a French Kiss. Please don't choose me!" He quickly added after reading the dare aloud. He gave Kendall a disparate look.

Kendall groaned and turned his gaze towards me. "Logan…"

I was shocked. "Why me! It's not fair! Choose Carlos!"

"I am not going to kiss Carlos after that drink from Jo" Well, I couldn't reason with that.

"Bad luck, Logie" Carlos almost sounded as if he pitied. Almost.

I was still cranky. "Sure. You just hate me. Let's just get it over with."

Kendall chuckled softly and walked towards me. He sat down in the empty spot next to me. "I'm an amazing kisser. Ask Jo. And stop whining, you decided to play this game."

I rolled my eyes. As if I would know something like this would happen. My breath hitched when Kendall's hand caressed my cheek. He started to lean in.

The next thing I knew were his lips on mine in one of the best kisses I ever had. After I recovered from the shock I kissed him back. His mouth was soft and I couldn't help but notice that our lips matched perfectly. He let his tongue slide along my lower lip to ask for access. Which I gave him gratefully. We had a small battle for dominance, that he won. The hand that wasn't on my face found his way to my hip. It was sweet and passionate and I could help but moan softly when his hand ran through my hair.

After thirty seconds James cleared his throat and I was almost mad at him for breaking our kiss. Then I realized where I was and freed myself from Kendall's hands. I shot him a confused look and he look almost as frustrated as I felt. He got up and walked back to his place next to Camille.

That's when I became aware of the other people. Rachel whispered something in Stephanie's ear and they laughed when they shot a glance towards me. Carlos and James shared a look and had a vague look on their face's.

"Well, that was interesting" Carlos said, snickering.

I imagined what our kiss must have looked like for the others and groaned. Kendall bit his bottom lip and looked hurt. _It keeps getting better…_

"Choose someone, Kendall" James voice quivered with suppressed laughter.

"You go"

"Okay, I take Dare" He answered and clicked the button.

"Change clothes with the person next from you" James looked besides him. On his right sits Jo and left Stephanie. He groaned.

"Girl's. Great. Do we have to switch everything? And then I really mean everything?" He asked desperately.

"Yes!" Everyone yelled. He groaned again.

"Well, Stephanie, you're wearing green, and Jo's in pink, so I'm gonna switch with you" He picked the girl in green up and marched to the bathroom with her.

The result was fantastic. Stephanie came out first in James' jogging pants and sweat shirt that were both way to big. She was no longer wearing a bra, something all the boys found rather hot. She had a huge smile on her face and had trouble not bursting out in laughter.

"I can't wait for you to see him. It's hilarious" She explained when we looked at her quizzically.

"James! Come out! It can't be that bad!" Shouted Carlos, who was still looking at Stephanie's chest. Camille hit him when she saw him doing that.

"I look ridiculous!" James walked out of the bathroom. He was wearing a bra and shirt that were too small for him. The short pants stretched tightly around his legs and waist. It was so, so funny. I almost fell to the floor and had big trouble breathing. Like many other that had seen James like this.

"Stop laughing! I'm sure this isn't the worst thing that will happen tonight!" James said in a high pitched voice and a burning face. He grumbled when we didn't listen to him.

"J-james. You're a really hot chick" Kendall had big difficulty talking.

"Shut up, Knight. You had to kiss Logan" Kendall and I immediately stopped laughing and James looked rather pleased with himself. He went to his place and put the laptop back in his lap.

"I choose Camille"

"Dare"

"Play a round of 'I have never' with the people that are wearing red. Instead of drinking you pull of a piece clothing" James read aloud. "Well, that's Logan, Stephanie, Carlos, Jo and you Camille"

"Cool. I never kissed someone of the same sex" Carlos said. I looked at him with a foul mood and took of my socks.

"I have never seen a sex movie" Camille said. I took of my shirt. Carlos and Jo went for their socks.

"Really Jo?" James asked and raised his eyebrows.

"I do not have to get into that" She said blushing.

"I never hadn't a crush on someone in this room" Stephanie stated. Carlos smiled at those words. I didn't look at Camille, we used to date and now I have to reveal that I never really liked her.

"Some people really want me naked" I said as I took of my pants. To my surprise turned both Kendall as Jo deep red. _So much for a joke…_

"I never had fun time with myself and got caught" I grinned at Carlos. He shot me a glare while taking of his pants. Camille blushed and took of her socks.

"Who caught you, Carlos?" James asked. He and Kendall burst out laughing when the Latino pointed at me.

"Last one. I never had glasses" Jo said. No one moved.

"I choose Logan" Camille said calmly. I looked at her. She didn't look angry or hurt as I expected after what I said.

"Dare" I was slightly afraid. I was already half naked and it wasn't even my turn yet.

James burst out laughing as soon as he saw the dare. He was unable to read it aloud and I prepared myself for the worst. Jo took the laptop and read aloud: "You have to give the person from your last turn a hickey"

James started to laugh even harder and Carlos followed his example. The girls hold on to each other in order not to fall. Kendall sighed.

"Come on, Logie. It's not that bad" I raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe it's a little bit weird, but you know this game."

I rolled my eyes and stood up. Camille made place so I could sit next to Kendall. Everyone stopped laughing and look intently at what I would do.

_Let's give them a little show… _I placed one hand on his neck and kissed his surprisingly soft jaw. Kendall sighed and closed his eyes. I worked my way down past his ear and started to use my tongue at his neck. I gave his pulse point a soft kiss before biting down harshly. Kendall let out a moan. I worked at the hickey for a minute, sucking and licking at the sensitive skin. I was very happy with myself when the blonde started gasping for air. After placing a last kiss to the mark, I leaned back to admire my beautiful peace of work.

"Kendall?" Camille said, she sounded a little strange. "I think you should go to the bathroom."

I heard people giggle and Kendall turned bright red. He got up and ran away before I knew what was going on.

"What was that about?" I asked confused to Camille.

She raised an eyebrow. "You didn't see it?"

"I didn't see what?" I asked irritated as everyone kept his mouth shut.

"After your great hickey, Kendall got, uh, a little problem" Carlos said chuckling.

"What the hell are you-" I stopped talking when it hit me. "Oh!" I shouted. _GREAT!\_

Before anyone could say another word Kendall came back. He sat down in my old place next to Jo. He looked very ashamed and didn't look at me.

"Not a word" He snapped at James when the latter tried to say something. James smiled broadly at Kendall, but did as asked and continued the game.

"Only me and Stephanie are left. Who first Logan?" Jo asked. She smiled sweetly.

"You go first"

"Truth" She told James who clicked the button.

"Who was the last person that saw you naked?" He asked eargerly.

"My mom" She shrugged.

"How boring!" Shouted Carlos and fell back in his seat.

"We can't have Kogan action dares all the time, Carlos. Although, those are very fun to watch" James said with a big grin on his face.

"Shut the fuck up, James. You're still wearing girl clothes" He stopped laughing.

"Let's play another game after Stephanie's turn. This is becoming boooring!" Carlos yawned.

"Agreed. Truth or Dare, Steph?"

"Truth"

"From the persons in this room, who do you think of the most?" James read.

She blushed and her feet were suddenly very interesting. "Carlos" She mumbled.

"Ahhh" giggled the girls. James, Kendall and me looked at Carlos. The Latino had a big smile on his face and refused to look at one of us.

"Moving on! What's your idea, Carlos?" I was certainly interested in every game that wasn't Truth or Dare and didn't involve me kissing Kendall. Or vice versa.


	2. Secrets

**Reveal the secret**

Carlos and me took our clothes back on while, James and Stephanie switched back in the bathroom. After cleaning up a bit, Carlos cut a hole in an old shoebox as preparation for his game.

"This is a game my sisters once told me about. You have to write your biggest secret on a piece of paper. We collect all the secrets in this box and then someone picks one. That person has to guess who it's from in one minute. If it's not revealed, the secret has to wait until all the other secrets have been guessed" Carlos clarified.

"Sounds fun" Jo said and we all gave a positive answer. "But I think we should print it, instead of writing it down. Someone might recognize your handwriting."

"I'll go first" I didn't really have a big secret, but I cheated on Camille with Rachel. It was just a kiss and I didn't know James had a thing for her. I never told Camille why I didn't want to date her anymore, but this was basically the reason. And I just don't like her like that. She makes a great friend, though. I thought it would make a good secret for the shoebox.

I typed, printed, folded my secret and then put it in the box.

One by one my friends followed. When Stephanie was the last to shove her secret in the box, she took it back to the living room and gave it to Carlos.

"Your game. You pick one first"

"I'm honored. Let's see" He fumbled in the box and choose a paper. "I know Kendall's biggest secret" He read aloud. "So it's a secret that you know Kendall's secret? That's weird."

I knew a lot about Kendall, but this was certainly not my secret and I didn't know his, and if it wasn't Carlos', it had to be James' secret. I couldn't think of anyone else.

Of course, Carlos didn't know what I did and guessed wrong. "Is this your secret, Logan?"

"Nope" I popped the 'p'.

"Then it's James'" He stated.

"Such a pity I can't tell you since your turn is over" He snickered. Carlos gave the box to Camille.

She grabbed a secret and a huge smile appeared on her face. "This one is fun. It says 'I like Logan'"

I was flabbergasted. Why didn't I notice? I scanned the room, looking for any signs of uneasiness, but everyone acted normal. I was going to have a hard time figuring this one out.

"I think it's only fair that Logan finds it out himself" She began. I looked at her in disbelief. "I already know who has a crush on him and I'm not gonna tell."

"Why not? I'm stunned! I have seriously know fucking idea!" I cried.

James laughed softly. "You'll find it out soon enough, Logie. Patience." I growled and glared at Camille who smiled sweetly at me. "You can still guess"

Stephanie liked Carlos. I thought Jo still liked Kendall even after they broke up. Rachel was into James and Camille… well, it certainly wasn't Camille's secret. "Rachel?"

"Not me" She said in a sing-song tone.

Camille gave the box to Kendall, who picked another secret. "I lied during 'I have never'. Well that's not me, James or Rachel. The first was I never kissed someone of the same sex. Logan lost his socks. Then Camille said she never saw a sex movie. Logan removed his shirt, while Carlos and Jo went for their socks" He analyzed. I raised an eyebrow.

"SOMEBODY was watching me tonight" I said suggestively. Kendall just laughed and went on.

"Stephanie said she liked someone in this room. Logan's pants came off"

"You're creeping me out, Kendall" He really was.

"I try" He smiled at me. "Moving on. Carlos and Logan took off way to many clothes, so I think they were honest. That leaves Camille, Jo and Stephanie. So, lucky guess… Camille?"

She sighed heavily. "You're right. It's my secret"

"Damn, I'm good!" Hi said arrogantly.

"When did you lie?" Jo asked curious.

She shrugged. "I didn't really like Logan. I never have."

Surprisingly, I wasn't mad at her. After all, I haven't liked her either. "That's okay. But why did we go out than? Since neither of us liked the other?" _'Cause that's confusing. _

"I kinda used you for publicity. I'm sorry" She said truthfully.

Again, I wasn't mad. "Don't be. I had fun with our little popcorn fight" We shared a wide smile. That had been amazingly funny. "Let's move on so I can find out who likes me."

Kendall handed the box to Rachel. "I cheated when I was dating someone" She read after picking out my secret. "That's too easy. Logan cheated on Camille with me" She shrugged and I rolled my eyes. Camille chuckled. "Then we're even. Since I kissed James that on time."

"So it's your secret?"

"It's is"

"Never thought you would do that, Logie" Carlos was slightly impressed. I blushed, it wasn't really I would do normally. It happened the day Camille kissed James. It was payback.

"Innocent little Logan" James shook his head in disapproval.

"Sure, James, whatever. Does anyone want a drink?" I received seven positive answers and went for the kitchen. I came back with eight beers and found Stephanie holding the shoebox. "Four down, four to go. Sit down Logan, I really want to continue this" James said impatiently. He took a bottle and concentrated on Stephanie who was reading a new secret.

"You're going to like this one, Logan"

"And why is that?"

"Because it says 'I like Logan'"

"We already had that one"

"This is a new one"

"I think someone printed his or her secret twice"

"I think that there are two people who like you"

"I think you guys are nuts"

"I think I know who these secrets are from"

"I think you should tell me then"

"I think you should find out yourself"

"I think it isn't fair"

"Make a guess, Logan"

"Is it yours?" It had to be. It wasn't Camille's or Rachel's. So it must be her and Jo. Didn't make sense, though. She liked Carlos. But there weren't any more options.

"It's not mine" Stephanie said amused.

"But it has to be. There are no more op-" There are more options. My felt my eyes grow wide. Carlos immediately began to laugh when he saw my face, but I ignored him. I stared at Kendall. He didn't meet my gaze, his shoes were a lot more interesting. _It all makes sense now…_

I didn't even know Kendall was into guys. I was, I told them a long time ago, but I never thought about dating one of my best friends. _Kendall was a good kisser, though._

Why didn't I notice this? How long has this been going on? When did it start? Why does James know? Why didn't _he_ tell me anything? Do I like him back? Am I willing to risk our friendship like that? What if it doesn't work out and we'll never talk to each other again? Why doesn't he look at me? How am I going to deal with him and Jo liking me? What if he hates me when I don't want to date him? Why do I have to cope with this? What if Gustavo fires us once he found out we're together- if that ever happens? This is like the weirdest, most complicated day of my life.

"Well now we know this, shall we go on?" James said. Kendall snapped out of his thoughts, but still didn't look at me. Jo however was smiling at me sweetly and flashing her eyelashes. I didn't know why, but I just didn't like her at all. She was pretty, but not beautiful. She was funny, but not spontaneous. She just wasn't what I was looking for and I was certainly not her type. What was her intention in all this then?

The rest of the night I was completely zoned out. My friends continued figuring out secrets and laughing together, while I was sorting things out. I heard them finding out that Stephanie's real name was Beatrice and that Carlos loves ballet. Everyone was shocked when Rachel turned out bisexual and had a thing for Jo's friend from New Town High. But, what else was new?

I snapped back to reality when everyone started to get ready for bed. We were all going to sleep on the mattress on the living room floor.

"Can I talk to you to for a minute?" I asked quietly looking at Jo and Kendall. I started walking towards the apartment door and led them outside. After closing the door carefully, I really didn't want anyone else to eavesdrop, I turned to look at them.

Jo was calm and Kendall was nervous. Something I wasn't used to. He was always the secure one, the leader, the one we turned to when we had a problem we couldn't solve ourselves.

I took a deep breath. "How long?"

"From the moment Kendall dumped me, probably because he likes you, and you comforted me. You were really sweet to me and really listened to what I said" I groaned inwardly. I instantly hated myself for that.

I turned my attention to Kendall. He kept silent and was once again staring at something way more interesting than me, his feet.

"How long?" I asked again, only to him this time.

"Tenth grade" He muttered. He still wasn't looking at me.

"Two years?" I asked incredulously. I didn't want to get into that with Jo around.

"Listen. I wasn't expecting this at all. You're both great, but I really have no feelings for neither of you" Both blondes got a sad look on their face. Kendall's showed more pain than Jo's, though. I felt pretty guilty.

"Let's just see were this is goes, okay? We still have a few weeks of vacation and maybe I'll develop something for one of you now that I know this" I really didn't think that would happen, but you never know, right? I felt even more guilty when their faces lit up with hope.

"Jo? Can you give us a minute? We'll be inside soon" She nodded, but not completely able to hide the jealous look in her eyes. She left us alone.

"Two years! You can't keep secrets for your best friends that long! Why didn't you tell me earlier?" I always told them everything. How he could manage to keep this secret, I had no idea. I felt like I didn't even know him anymore.

"Why I didn't tell you? Maybe because I had feelings for you? Maybe because I was terrified that you would hate me if I told you? That you would never talk to me again? I only told you tonight because James forced me to. As if I liked it to keep secrets from you!" He said, frustrated. When his eyes finally met mine, I saw tears. Kendall wiped them away impatiently.

"I would never do that" I whispered. Pulling him closer so I could hug him. "I should have realized this was hard for you to. I'm sorry" He wrapped his arms around my shoulders. "I was just surprised. I had no idea what to think and that's new, since I always know what to think."

He chuckled softly and leaned back a bit so he could look at me. "Thanks."

"It's okay" I answered. Suddenly I noticed how close he actually was. I looked at him while putting one of my hands on the back of his neck, slowly pulling him closer. His breathing quickened when he realized what I was about to do, but he didn't stop me. I could feel his breathe when we were rudely interrupted by Carlos.

"You guys coming? We're about to turn off the light!" He yelled threw the door.

"I owe you this one" I whispered against his lips before turning around and walking back into 2J.

I made sure I wasn't lying next to Kendall or Jo. If only it was to prevent to hurt one of them. James and Kendall had one of their silent conversations. They didn't know I was paying attention. James raised his eyebrows and made a small gesture to me. Kendall shrugged and smiled a tiny little bit. James grinned and lay down between me and Rachel.

It didn't take long before everyone was fast asleep. I felt tired and sleepy from the alcohol, but I had way too much on my mind to sleep. There was one particular question that haunted my thoughts. Why was I desperately wishing to kiss Kendall again?

I turned to lay on my other side and found I wasn't the only one still awake. James was lying on his back with his hands under his head, eyes wide open.

"I didn't know you were still awake" I whispered. I got up on my elbow so I could see his face.

"What did you tell Kendall?" He asked directly.

"I asked him and Jo how long this had been going on. For Jo just a few weeks, Kendall however has been feeling this for two years! Why didn't you tell me anything?"

James ignored the question. "Anymore?"

I sighed. "I told them I currently didn't crush on either of them, but that we'll she where this goes. I sent Jo away so I could talk to Kendall alone. He wasn't very happy about me being mad at him and we had a tiny fight, but made up quickly." James didn't need to know what almost happened after that.

"I really think you should give him a chance" He sounded very serious and looked me in the eyes. "He really likes you a lot and I'm sure this isn't something temporary. He's only scared it would ruin your friendship."

"That's also what I'm afraid of. How long do you know this anyway?"

James snickered. "That's actually a funny story. A few months ago we sat by the pool watching you and Carlos play. I made a joke about you two looking like a married couple, but Kendall didn't take it very well. I told him it was just a joke, but he wasn't really listening. He kept a close watch on you, that's the moment I became suspicious"

"I remember that! I had no clue what I had done to make Kendall mad at me. He ignored me for a whole week!" I said, relieved that his strange behavior of that week was explained.

"So, from that moment I kept an eye out. I started to notice a lot more things. He is always looking at you when you sing, he takes every kind of work from you. He pretends he doesn't understand things so you can explain it to him, while just minutes before that he could tell me everything about that subject. When we came here, he insisted on sharing a room with you, supposedly because he can't sleep because of Carlos' snoring and me standing up at six. I think we know the real reason by now. He works his butt of to impress you. He-"

"I think I get it, thank you" I said and James grinned widely. "So you confronted him?"

"Another good story!" He said enthusiastically. I saw Rachel blinking her eyes, but she closed them again and turned her back on us.

"A little bit softer, James" I whispered. "Go on."

"Exactly six weeks ago we had a little conversation in class. You were sitting next to me, but I didn't think you noticed us passing a note."

"I did. It was very irritating, but I knew you wouldn't let me stop you, so I kept my mouth shut."

"Aha. Anyways, I think I still have that note. You want to read it?"

"Hell yeah!"

James smiled, stood up and walked to his room without waking anyone. After a minute or two he came back with an abused note in his hand.

"Here. I hope you can still read it"

_If I ask you a question, you promise to answer honestly?_

**Depends, is it about your hair?**

_No, jerk. It's about Logan._

**What's up with him?**

_Are you Do you like him?_

**Of course! He is one of my best friends!**

_That's not what I meant and you know it. Do you have a crush on him?_

**No. What makes you think that?**

_We are not gonna think differently about you for liking a guy if that's what you're afraid of._

**I DO NOT LIKE LOGAN**

_You're only drooling your table when you look at him. I see you do it at least ten times a day. You do everything for him and you're constantly around him. Of course you don't like him. PLEASE NOTE THE SARCASM._

**He'll hate me once he finds out.**

_He cares about you too much to do that. Knowing Logan, he'll do everything to help you or in the worst he'll reject you in the friendliest way possible. He would never hurt you on purpose, he's way to sensitive for that. Do you want me to talk to him?_

**I swear, James. If you do that I'll break your Lucky comb in a million little pieces.**

_If you haven't told him a month from now, I'm going to do it. It's not fair to keep this a secret. Even if Logan doesn't feel the same way about you._

**That's what I'm scared of. I don't want to lose his friendship. I rather have him as a friend, than no Logan at all. I just need to get over him.**

_I mean it, Kendall. If you don't tell him, I will._

**Six weeks?**

_Sure. You have until the 8th of July._

**I hate you, Diamond.**

I finished reading and was about to say something to James, but he was already asleep. I folded the note and held it in my hand. _Sleeping isn't such a bad idea…_


	3. Confession

**Confession**

A week past and I became more and more irritated and frustrated. Both Kendall and Jo were following me around everywhere. I was never alone. And then I mean never.

They were really sweet and tried their hardest to impress me. They got me drinks, carried stuff for me, opened doors for me, complimented me and were always touching me in some way. They were doing their best. It sickened me.

I already knew both of them and this was not how they acted normally. I would be much more impressed if they left me alone once in a while and did their own thing.

The other problem was the pressure. Not only Kendall and Jo wanted an answer, but James, Carlos, Stephanie, Rachel and Camille wanted one too. They were just as sick and tired as I was of their sweet flirts all the time. However, they made money of it. Which was part of the pressure. James, Carlos and surprisingly Camille thought I should choose Kendall. They went on so far, that they took bets and gave t-shirts to all the people of the Palm Woods with 'Team Kendall' written on them in thick red letters. Stephanie and Camille came back with the same shirts, but with 'Team Jo' in a pink, curly letter type.

Everyone who lived in the Palm Woods knew about our little drama and chose sides. After three days me, Kendall and Jo were the only ones not wearing one of those shirts. I started to go nuts.

"I'm so fucking done with them!" I yelled, walking into the living room of our apartment. I slammed the door behind me. Everyone besides Jo and Kendall sat on the couch or floor watching a movie.

I escaped from the blondes by telling them I had to go to the bathroom. They would find out soon enough I lied. Not that they would mind, they wanted me to much to be mad at me.

"Team KOGAN!" James screamed.

"Choose Jo, Logan!" Rachel said and slapped James on the back of his head.

"Kendall!"

"Jo!"

"Kend-"

"THIS ISN'T HELPING!" I yelled. Finally they kept their mouths. I didn't lose my self-control that often. "I don't want to choose. I want them both to see that it's better to remain friends. Jo and Kendall hate each other thanks to this and if I choose one of them the other will hate me too. How am I going to do this without hurting anyone?" I didn't wait for an answer, because no one would give me one. I ran to the room me and Kendall shared and slammed the door. That's two in two minutes. Great.

I had been sitting in my room for half an hour when I heard a knock and Camille walked in with half a pizza. "I thought you'd be pretty hungry by now" She said hesitating, afraid I would still be mad.

"Thanks, Camille" I smiled softly.

The relief was evident on her face. She closed the door and walked over to me so she could sit beside me on the ground against the wall. We said nothing while I was eating the pizza. She couldn't hold it anymore when I was finished, though.

"Do you know what you're gonna do about this mess?" She asked quietly.

"Honest? I have no idea. It's impossible to get out of this without hurting one or both of them"

"Let's get this straight. You don't like either of them?"

I hesitated. "No. I don't think so?"

"Think?"

"I don't get Jo. What the hell is she going on about? She's way too capricious. I have no clue if she's serious about this or not. I think it might be payback to Kendall for breaking up with her. And Kendall, well, I don't know about him. He clearly likes me. A lot. And I love him, as a friend, but I don't know if there are more feelings than that. If that's even possible. I would hate myself if I lost our friendship over this by going in a relationship that maybe won't even work out. I'm going to commit suicide if I ruined what we had for twelve years." Loosing Kendall would be like losing a limb. I could not let that happen.

"You're right about Jo, you know" Camille whispered.

I gave her a surprised look.

"She still likes Kendall and really can't stand him for liking you more than her. She doesn't like you, she likes the idea of liking someone who Kendall likes" She said, before adding "That were a lot of likes."

"How do you know this?" I asked incredulously.

"We had a fight the day after 'the big revelation'. That's the main reason I think you should choose Kendall. She's being a bitch and he is clearly into you. Besides, he's freaking hot"

"Yeah…" Did I just say that? I didn't mean to. Camille got a really amused look on her face, but didn't go into it.

"So I'm not going to choose Jo" I decided. It immediately felt good. Such a relieve.

"I can't say I'm sorry for her"

"Do you know a good way to tell Kendall it's not going to work out?"

"Why don't you just give him a chance? Just a minute ago you admitted you thought he's hot"

I blushed. "I'm not going to ruin a perfectly good friendship for a relationship that might not work out. He'll get over it" I said resolute.

Camille looked doubtful. "I'm not so sure about that" She muttered under her breath. "I think you should talk to him and just tell him what you think. He can't change the way you feel about him"

"I'll do that first thing tomorrow"

I woke up around two in the morning, because James hit me with his elbow. It took me a while to realize he was standing up and walking towards a person sitting at the kitchen table. I decided to pretend I was still asleep, since I didn't want to disturb their little moment.

"Why are you still up?" I heard James asking softly.

"Couldn't sleep" I heard another voice saying. Kendall.

"You got a lot on your mind, huh?"

"What if he chooses Jo? I think I wouldn't be able to get over that"

_No! Please Kendall! Don't do this to me!_

"I'm sure he's not going for Jo"

"How do you know?"

"I just know. He's not going to hurt you like that"

_No, no, no, no, no, no!_

"I hope you're right." He sounded really miserable. _Wonderful._

"Listen. Logan isn't going to choose her. You mean way too much for him to do that. He is that last person in this whole fucking world that would hurt you. Logan can't stand it if one of his friends is hurt or sad and definitely not when he's the cause of it. He's just under a lot of pressure since everyone wants an answer from him. Logan panics under pressure, which is why he's so irritated and tense all day. Perhaps also a little because you and Jo don't leave him alone, he's not that much of a people-person and likes to be alone once in a while. Just stop following him around everywhere and just be yourself. If he's gonna fall for you, he'll fall for the real Kendall and not someone that's irritating him all day"

_Please do what James says Kendall… _I really, really hoped that.

"I can finally show him how much I like him, James. I've been waiting two years for this moment. I've never fallen so hard for anyone, as for Logan"

_This can't be worse… _It became much worse.

"I think I love him"

James gave no answer. I couldn't possibly blame him. No one knows what to say after a confession of this kind.

This was bad. For real. I didn't want to hurt Kendall, but now I didn't have a choice. I just wanted to remain friends, but I would destroy his heart if I ever told him that. And if I didn't say anything at all and just kept avoiding him, I would still hurt him eventually. It would just take longer. If I pretended to give him a chance and then broke up with him, it wouldn't be much better. I would just give him hope and then crush it like a fly. What the hell was I supposed to do? Why was I in this situation?

I had stopped listening to their conversation, trying to get everything straight, but the mention of my name got my attention.

"Just talk to Logan tomorrow"

"And then what? Tell him I love him? He would just freak out, James"

_I'm already freaking out, Kendall. Doesn't matter anymore…_

"He'll find out eventually. Why not trying to just tell him? I'll stay with you, if you want"

_I hate you, James. You're giving him the wrong idea!_

"That would be nice" Kendall sighed. "Let's go to sleep"

After a long time, I heard their breathing slow down and knew they were asleep once again. I waited a little while longer before getting up, dressing, and writing a note for James. I fled the apartment. I was going to walk until it was safe enough to come back.

At seven o'clock I reached my destination. The quiet place by the rocks where I could just sit and think about everything. I knew what I was going to do. I decided it while walking to this place. I wasn't able to face Kendall and turn him down. I would just break his heart and I didn't want to be the one to see him breaking down. I wouldn't be able to comfort him. So I did the last thing I could think of. The lowest move you can possibly make. I was going to text him.

**To: Kendall 7:02 Message: I don't feel the same way about you. I'm so, so sorry.**

**Poor Kendall. Logan's such a douche. What do you think? Did I make any mistakes?**


	4. Realization

**Realization **

I was so furious. I couldn't wait for Logan to get back so I could kill him. He couldn't be serious about this. He just couldn't be. Kendall wouldn't survive this once he found out. I took another look at the little note Logan left for me, hoping the words would change into something less painful.

_James,_

_I heard you talking last night. I don't want to hurt him, I really don't, but I just don't feel the same way about him. Please try to prepare him a little. I'm going to talk to him when I get back. Please, don't hate me. Logan._

I decided to send him a very pissed text. Just to release some of my frustration.

**To: Logan 9:15**

**Message: How am I supposed to tell him that you are not giving him so much as a chance? After he confessed he fucking LOVES you? Just give him that chance. He deserves it.**

**To: James 9:17**

**Message: I sent him a text two hours ago. Go make sure he's OK.**

It hadn't even noticed that Kendall was gone before I got that text. I searched 2J, but he was nowhere to be found. I didn't think it was possible for me to get even madder at Logan, but he managed it. I decided to wake Carlos up.

"We have to find Kendall. Now" I said urgently.

Carlos was immediately on his feet looking around for Kendall who, obviously, wasn't here.

"Why exactly?"

I gave him Logan's note and showed him the text. Carlos started to dress himself as fast as possible. "And he isn't in the apartment?" He asked while walking towards the door.

"No, I looked everywhere"

"I'm going to kill Logan, when he gets his unworthy ass back here"

"I'm very willing to help, my friend"

"Great" Carlos grumbled. He slammed the lift button.

"I'm taking the stairs upstairs. I'll work from the roof downwards. You check the lobby, the pool and the park" I said to Carlos who nodded before entering the lift. I ran up the stairs to the roof. I really hoped he wasn't there. I didn't think Kendall suicidal, but the thought of him on a roof in this situation is just scary.

He wasn't on the roof. Thank god. He also wasn't on the fourth, third, second or first floor. I asked everyone if they'd seen him, but of course no one had. I broke down every supply closet and bathroom in my search for Kendall, but I never found him. When I crossed 2J, I warned the girls and they started looking for him as well. I didn't tell them why, but they seemed to understand it was important. Rachel and Jo went upstairs, looking for anything I might have missed. Camille and Stephanie came with me downstairs. We just entered the lobby when I got a text from Carlos.

**To: James 9:45**

**Message: Found him. Fountain in the park. Please hurry.**

That's when it hit me Carlos still didn't know the complete story and wasn't able to do a thing for Kendall.

"Carlos found him. You go back to the apartment, I'll keep you updated" I didn't wait for an answer and just started running towards the park.

Kendall sat on the edge of the fountain. His head in his hands, elbows on his knees. Carlos got a relieved look on his face and started walking up to me. He stopped me a few feet away from Kendall.

"James what happened exactly last night?" He asked softly. He was utterly concerned.

"Kendall told me that he loves Logan. We both had no idea the jerk was actually awake. You know the rest"

Carlos expression went blank before murderously furious. It would have been funny in another situation. He took his phone and started typing a message. From the look on his face I thought I had a pretty good idea what it said and who the receiver was.

**Realization~Realization**

Four people sent me messages. The first one was from James. The next one was from Carlos, James again, Camille and Jo. None of them was really positive.

**From: Carlos 9:23**

**Message: I don't really know what you did, but I hope you've got a good reason for it. James is murderous.**

**From: Carlos 9:24 **

**Message: Kendall disappeared. We're looking for him. You've got something to explain.**

**From: Carlos 9:46**

**Message: I found him. What did you do to make him this lifeless?**

**From: Carlos: 9:51**

**Message: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU. How could you do this, Logan? I don't even know if I can forgive you, let alone Kendall.**

I didn't know what to tell him besides that I was sorry. So that's what I did. After that I didn't get anymore texts from Carlos.

**From: Camille 9:52**

**Message: Why are C and J so desperately searching for Kendall? What did you do? Where the hell are you?**

**From: Jo 10:01**

**Message: What's going on? S, R, C and I have no clue. What did you say? Does this have something to do with me and Kendall liking you?**

I didn't know what to tell them. What I wanted to tell them. I was afraid they would be just as mad at me as Carlos and James were. After a little more thinking I decided to only tell Camille.

**From: Logan 10:08**

**Message: I'm on the beach. Can you come over here?**

**From: Camille 10:09**

**Message: I'm on my way. Are you gonna tell me what happened? Where are you exactly?**

**From: Logan 10:09**

**Message: The rocks**

**From: Camille 10:11**

**Message: 20 minutes**

I got one more text from James. After that one I decided to turn off my mobile.

**From: James 10:16**

**Message: Congrats. You fucked up. You're the First person who managed to break Kendall fucking Knight. Carlos and I are sorting out the little pieces that are left of him. We're not holding back when you get here. **

**From: Logan 10:17**

**Message: I'm so sorry. I won't stop you**

I had to do this, right? This was for the best. I didn't have feelings for Kendall, did I? Then you can't be with that person. That would only hurt the other person more once he found out. Then why the fuck did I feel like I made the biggest mistake of my life?

Kendall's pain cut deep wounds in my heart. I felt awful. He would never forgive me this. If James and Carlos had a hard time forgiving me, I couldn't imagine Kendall doing it. He probably didn't even want to look at me again. So much for keeping our friendship, I didn't just lose Kendall but James and Carlos as well. Which I completely understand, I was a jerk, A heartbreaker. And who wants to be friends with a jerk?

I didn't know what to expect when I would go home. I didn't know what I would find there. But I was preparing myself for the worst. A slow painful death, murderers? James and Carlos maybe Jo Oh, and Mrs. Knight and Katie.

I didn't have to wait that long for my end however, I heard Camille coming before I saw her.

"Hi" I said smothered. My voice stifled by tears. I hadn't been aware of the fact I had been crying Strange.

"Hey" She sat down next to me and wrapped her arms around me. I put my head on her shoulder and continued crying. She held me close and mumbled soothing words in my ear while stroking my back until I was able to talk normally again.

I sat up straight again, "thanks" My voice was still hoarse.

"You're welcome" She gave me a sad smile. "What happened, Logan?"

I took a deep breath. "Kendall and James had a little chat last night. He told James he loves me. I didn't think it was meant for my ears, but James woke me when he was standing up."

Camille remained silent, waiting for me to continue.

"I couldn't sleep after that, so I waited until James and Kendall were sleeping before I got up and left. I wrote James a note, wherein I told I heard everything and that he had to prepare Kendall for the worst. My intentions were to talk to him once I got back, but I panicked and sent him a text" Camille gasped.

"I know. I'm a tactless jerk who just broke his best friend's heart into a million tiny little pieces. No need to tell me. Anyways, two hours later James texted me a pissed text about the note I left. I got a few from Carlos too. Here" I handed her my phone so she could read them herself.

"Carlos wasn't exaggerating. James was furious, when I saw him last time" She said while giving the phone back to me.

"Wonderful" I said sarcastically.

"I think you do have feeling for him, otherwise you wouldn't be crying your eyes out. You're just afraid to admit it. What are you gonna do about it Logan?"

"Even if that's true, I'm not risking our friendship"

"What friendship?"

I was shocked. She might actually have a point there.

"You didn't even give him so much as a chance. You turned him down with a text. He loves you and you just tell him you don't even want to try being with him? And you think he still wants to be your friend after that? You gave him enough reasons to hate you. It's hard, Logan, but I don't know if you're able to make it up to him again"

She was so right and I had been so wrong. My whole world shattered before my eyes. Just like I did to Kendall's heart. No friends. No Kendall. No James or Carlos. No band. No reason to stay. But this time I wasn't going to run from my problems.

"You're right" I said to Camille while standing up. "I'm going back now to try and fix this mess. I'll let James and Carlos hit me first and then go talk to Kendall. Are you driving?"

"Yup, I'm glad you see it yourself and stopped running from the problems you created. What are you going to tell him?" I helped her up and we started walking back to her car.

"I'm not sure yet. I try not to think of it, that way I won't be able to run away"

"That's probably a good idea"

**Realization~Realization**

Fifteen minutes later we got back to the Palm Woods. I tried very hard not to think about what I was going to do. Camille got out of the car and walked over to the passenger side to drag me out of the seat. We walked to 2J together. Or actually, Camille dragged my unwilling body along. I turned her into a hug once we got by the door.

"Thanks Camille" I muttered. "Well, that's it then. I'm going to die. It was nice knowing you, though" I said seriously.

"Don't be a drama queen. Text me when this is over" She pulled the door open and pushed me inside. On the first sight, the apartment seemed abandoned. There was no one in the kitchen or living room and I was about to sigh in relieve when I heard footsteps on top of swirly.

"Who's- oh!" Carlos' face turned hard when he saw me. "JAMES!" He yelled over his shoulder before sliding down the slide.

"Oh crap" I cursed mumbling.

James saw me and the murderous look Camille describe came back on his face. He followed Carlos down the slide.

In the time I took to look at James, Carlos got in front of me and punched my jaw. Hard.

And if Carlos' was hard, James' punch was bone shattering. Right after I got over the one from Carlos, James punched the other side of my face.

"I probably deserved those" I muttered, controlling my face on serious injuries.

Carlos and James stared at me furiously. "What the hell are you doing here?" James asked finally, his voice full of hatred.

"Yes, uh, I came to talk to Kendall" I stuttered.

"Never" James and Carlos blocked my when I started to walk towards the stairs. I did a quick think. These two were not going to stop me now.

"Right. Okay. I just-" I sneaked past James and ran up the stairs, taking two at a time. I've always been faster than them and I was already up the stairs when they started moving. I ran past the other doors straight to mine and Kendall's and tried to open it, but found it locked. Of course.

"Kendall!" I screamed. "Let me in! I'm a worthless prick that made the biggest mistake of his life sending you that text this morning! I can't stand myself for hurting you! Please, don't hate me. I can't handle that, Kendall. Just open the fucking door!" I collapsed against said object and whipped some new tears away. Carlos and James were standing on the other side of the hallway, watching. I choose to ignore them.

"Fine, than this is going to be a monologue. I should have never done that. Not in this way. Not in anyway. I just panicked when I heard you talking yesterday. It's no excuse for doing what I did, but it's the reason I did it. I just wanted our friendship to last over all. I was scared it would be ruined when we started dating and it didn't work out. Camille, however, helped me see that there is currently no friendship at all. So what I was trying to prevent, happened after all. I'm terrified of loosing you guys, it's like my worst nightmare coming true."

I was silent for a while. Hoping for any kind of a reaction and trying to control my breathing.

"If you ever forgive me, I don't want to be your friend anymore. I want to be more than that. If you ever forgive me, I'll give you that chance I should have given to you right away. Because now, in this very moment, I realized I have been so blind. You're amazing. And I don't know about love, but there's definitely more than friendship. Well, –Carlos and James aren't helping me very much with those stupid grins on their faces- but I like you. A lot. Can you please open the door now?"

I held my breath. One minute. Two minutes. The door didn't open. I was disappointed en started walking away to drown myself in the pool. James and Carlos gave me sad looks and patted my back when walking by them. Halfway the stairs, I heard the most beautiful noise in the world. The lock of a door.

I turned around and saw Kendall leaning against the doorpost, glowing like he was the sun. James and Carlos tried to melt into the wall.

"I think you owe me something" He said beaming.

I was now grinning also and almost ran back to him. I stood in front of him, suddenly shy. I blushed and started looking at my feet. Kendall had other plans, though. I grabbed my chin and moved my head so I had to look at him.

"I forgive you. Just don't do this again, okay?" He looked in my eyes urgently.

"Promise" I said breathlessly.

His green eyes lit up. He stared at me intently and it would be very uncomfortable if this hadn't been Kendall. He started to lean in slowly, so very slowly. I decided I didn't want to wait anymore and closed the last remaining distance between us.

It was so much better than our first kiss. This one was unforced and sweet, it made the world stop turning. His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer. It was amazing, spectacular and It let me forget there were other people than Kendall and me in the room. I opened my lips slightly, allowing him to shove his tongue in my mouth. The fight for dominance quickly won by Kendall and I laid my arms around his neck. It was the best kiss in the world and it was way too short. Kendall rested his forehead against mine.

"Best kiss ever" He whispered.

"You bet"

"Shortest one ever, too"

"We can make it longer?"

He kissed me again, A little less innocent than the last one. I was out of breath sooner, that wasn't the reason we stopped though. James cleared his throat rather loudly and Carlos giggled. I let go of Kendall and tried unsuccessfully to free myself from his grasp, but he wouldn't let me. He allowed me to turn around, but kept me close with the arm around my waist. I was too scared to meet their gazes, I hid my blushing face against Kendall's shoulder.

"Well, we know who the girls is now"

"A girl you can hit!" Said James eagerly.

"I don't think so!" Kendall said angry. He wrapped his arms around me securely.

James and Carlos exchanged glances and doubled over in laughter. I started to blush even more and began to feel like a girl. I didn't mind hiding my face against Kendall he smelled nice.

"Did they hit you?" Kendall asked seriously after a little thinking.

"Yes…" I admitted. Damn, it hurt. "I did deserve it, though"

"I don't like it when people hit you, if you deserve it or not" Kendall whispered in my hair.

I looked at him. "Are you going to be this protective all the time?" I asked frowning.

"Probably" He grinned.

"It's going to take a while before I'm used to it"

Kendall raised his eyebrows. "You should already have been used to it after twelve years"

"So it's not going to be a million times worse for me?"

"…"

"That's what I thought" I sighed.

"You know you like it"

"Maybe"

"I'm sorry we hit you, Logie" James said as soon as he stopped laughing.

"Please don't send Kendall after us, I don't think we'll survive that" Carlos added and they began to laugh again.

I hid my face against Kendall's shoulder again. That's three. It's unbelievable how much I've been blushing since I made up with Kendall. I hoped he didn't see it. _I feel like such a girl right now…_

**Okay, so, I'M NOT DONE YET! This is not the end! I've written the whole story in Dutch, I just have to translate it. What do you think? Logan won't be that much of a girl. I really, really liked all the reviews I got so far! And a great thanks to Storylover158 for helping me :)**

**Voor Nederlandse mensen: Zal ik de complete versie uploaden? In het Nederlands dus?**


	5. Blushing

**Blushing**

That day became one of the best of my life. I haven't seen Kendall this happy, since… well, ever. And that's what I did it for. He never stopped touching me, didn't let me go for one single moment. I didn't mind, surprisingly, I even liked it.

All the people from 'Team Kendall' started cheering when they saw him holding my hand as we reached the pool. He even bowed and I tried desperately not to turn red, without any change of success. I never blushed so much in my entire life as I did today. In one hour. I felt the blood rising to my face when he looked at me. When he grabbed my hand. When he talked. When he said my NAME. He never said a thing about, though, so I hoped he just didn't notice.

We have been sitting by the pool all day. Just hanging around and talking and now we're about to watch a movie. We allowed the girls to choose one, but only because they swore it would be a man-friendly story. So nothing hopeless romantic or chick-flicks. Thank god. I might be the girl in my relationship with Kendall, I definitely wasn't one, and I hated girls-movies.

Camille, however, decided to make it worse. By choosing the one movie genre I hated more the chick-flicks. Psychological thrillers. _Great!_

"We're gonna watch Black Swan, in that way Carlos can have some fun, too" She explained, purposely not looking at me. She knew I hated that kind of movies.

"Sounds good to me" James said. He took the remote and started the movie.

"Wonderful" I said, gritting teeth.

"Looks like we're about to watch a thriller" Kendall said smug. "Wait, aren't you scared of those movies?"

"You had something to do with this, didn't you?" I pouted and turned away from him.

"Maybe"

"I don't like you anymore"

"So you're not going to need my shoulder to hide at scary parts?" He won. And he knew it, loved it. If the cocky grin on his face hadn't been so sexy, I would never give in. Or maybe I would. Maybe.

"Just get over here" I scooted over to make some place, but Kendall had different ideas. He lifted me up my feet and sat down on the mattress I had been sitting on. He pulled me down and wrapped his arms around my chest so I was sitting between his legs, my back against his chest. He held me firmly in place. Right in front of the TV. Without any possibilities of hiding. My worst nightmare playing on the screen.

"Sweet, sweet revenge" Kendall whispered in my ear.

I groaned. "I should have known"

"Too late. Enjoy the movie, Logie"

I sighed and agreed with just seeing how bad it would be. It wasn't that bad. In the beginning.

I tried my best not to watch the movie, but it was as if you couldn't stop watching. Carlos was completely in the story. Stephanie and Jo were holding hands for support. James and Rachel sat incredibly close, but didn't touch each other. You could see the tension.

Turning my face back to the screen, I saw the creepiest thing ever. Natalie Portman pulling little feather from the wounds on her shoulder. I froze. This was exactly what I didn't like. I watched her self destruct in horror and decided I had had enough of this. I tried turning around and astonishingly enough, Kendall allowed me to.

"I'm proud of you. You have been watching for almost an hour" The blonde whispered in my hear.

"As if I had a choice"

"I would never force you to watch something you don't like"

"…"

"I would've let you turn away the moment you wanted to. I just held you, because I wanted you to stay here"

I was blushing again and was glad it was too dark for Kendall to see. "So I have been watching for nothing and-"

"Logan! Shut the hell up!" Carlos snapped.

"Go to sleep, sweetie" Kendall said softly, so that only I could hear it. I was pretty tired, just wanted to know one last thing.

"Kendall?"

"Hmm?"

"Why sweetie?"

"If you don't-"

"Don't worry, I like it. I was just wondering why you choose for sweetie"

"'Cause you are"

All the girls made an 'ahw' noise. The kind of sounds they make when you see a cute puppy doing something stupid. I hadn't noticed they stopped watching the movie and listening to me and Kendall. I, of course, turned red again.

"There's the tomato head! I was starting to worry, it had been away for almost TEN MINUTES!"

"JAMES!"

"Don't be such a baby, Logan. Kendall already knew you blushed everytime he does something like that. You even blush when he hasn't done a single thing!"

"I even counted them" Kendall added. "I lost count after 43, however. That was in two hours time" I moaned. Carlos and James were laughing their heads off and had trouble breathing. Kendall chuckled softly. I rested my head on his chest and started to focus on his breathing and heartbeats while everyone turned his or her attention back to the movie. It turned out to be the best lullaby in the world and didn't take long to fall asleep.

**Blushing~Blushing**

God, I loved him so much. It was sick. I watched him drifting off to sleep as I did every night, but did was the first time he was laying in my arms. His head on my chest. His arms around me. I still had a hard time believing he was mine. My Logan.

I have been waiting two years for this day, and it turned out to be even better than I hoped. Only the beginning was a little bad. I had a hard time letting go off him since we made up this morning. I was afraid I would wake up from this dream if I didn't touch him in some way. I had a major panic attack when he was gone for two minutes –bathroom. Logan was probably right when he assumed my protectiveness would be a million times worse for him. But hey! I finally had him, I couldn't just let him get hurt or something.

That made me think of something. I looked back at the little brunette against me and studied the part of his face I could see. Logan had been pretending it didn't hurt, but I knew better. I saw a little flash of pain every once in a while. No I took a better look, I could see bruises on his jaw on the places where Carlos and James hit him. Even if he deserved it, why would you punch Logan? No one ever fought with him. He was way to passively to fight back. The one time he did fight back, _he won. _

Against _James._ Even I had never won a fight against James. But Logan turned out to be too fast and flexible to reach. You just couldn't touch him if he didn't want you to. He hit James on some kind of nerve and it took _four hours _for James to get back the feeling in his arm. Nobody tried to fight with the shorter brunette after that.

This meant that he didn't jump out of the way when James and Carlos punched him. Even though he could do that easily. It meant that Logan really thought he deserved it and that made me frown. I would have to keep Logan out of fights from now on.

I glared at James and Carlos who were both watching the movie very intently. I couldn't handle my friends getting hurt. Especially Logan. I know they did it for me, but you just couldn't hurt Logan without expecting me to take revenge. The last ten minutes of the movie, I spent plotting my payback on James and Carlos.

"Is she dead?" Carlos asked confused when the credits rolled over the TV.

"I have no idea" James answered irritated.

Logan moved a bit. "Be quiet will you?" I said angrily. _Everything for Logan…_

"Sorry"

"Let's get go to sleep" Jo said, holding a very sleepy Camille. James went over to help her with the method actress. Everyone else lay down too.

I stroked Logan's hair. _Yes, I love him so, so much…_

**Completely random! I just love making Logan blush. What do you think? Please review so I can make it better!**


	6. Preparation

**Preparation**

I woke up early staring at Logan before deciding to put my revenge plan on James and Carlos into action. I let go of Logan without waking him up and walked over to the refrigerator. Pulling out two large bottles of water, I walked into their room as I glanced over at the pair who were luckily still asleep. I stood in between them while quickly dispatching of the lids opening the bottles. I held a bottle above each of my friends and yelled "FIRE!"

Needless to say everyone was immediately awake as I emptied the bottles all over James and Carlos. The cold liquid drowned their clothes and part of both beds as they screamed louder than two boys their age should be able to.

"Kendall! What was that for?" Carlos asked angry.

"YOU RUINED MY HAIR!"

"That was for hitting Logan" I said satisfied. I looked over at the small brunette who clearly had no clue if he should be mad or amused. He went for the latter and started grinning broadly.

"We already told him we were sorry!"

"Yeah, that was before I noticed the DAMN BRUISES ON HIS FACE!"

"You better sleep with one eye open, Kendall, this definitely isn't over!" James said and Carlos nodded eagerly.

"I would wait for tomorrow if I were you" Logan said.

"Why?" James asked taken aback.

"You don't remember what tomorrow is?" Logan got a look of pure disbelief on his face.

"PRANKWAR!" Screamed Carlos suddenly.

"Exactly. I'm going to win this year" Logan said smugly.

"It's not fair, thought" James said grumpy.

"Why the hell not?" I asked tiredly. This was the same every year.

"Logan is the only one who is able to win" He said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"He never won. What makes you think he'll win this year?" Carlos asked and Logan threw a pillow at his still wet head.

"Kendall wouldn't dare hurting his precious Logie and he'll kill us when we try to do it. And I have to say, I DON'T WANT HIM TO RUIN MY HAIR AGAIN!"

"Oh, please! As if I can't look after myself! Kendall, promise me you won't hold back on me and don't try to kill James or Carlos when they try to prank me" Logan said strict.

"Fine" I spat.

"Promise me"

"Fine! I promise"

"Good. I'm going to take a shower" Announced Logan and he walked away.

"I'm going to change into something DRY" James and Carlos said simultaneously and left together. _Gosh, they would make a great couple…_

"And you? Are you gonna join the war?" I asked the girls.

"Camille and I have auditions tomorrow" Jo said. Camille looked disappointed.

"I can't participate either. I'm going to a baby shower with my mom" Rachel sounded relieved. She didn't like our prank war at all. She hated to attend last year.

"Stephanie?"

"I'm not attending as the only girl, Kendall. You guys go have fun together"

"That's probably the best idea. So what are we going to do today? Are you staying here?"

"No, we're going shopping, but we'll be back by the afternoon" Jo said.

"We still got 5 weeks till your mom and Katie come back, right? It's so much fun here, I don't think we're going to sleep anywhere else the next few weeks" Camille said.

"That's fine. I'm going to make you girls some breakfast before you go" I stated as I started to make some waffles.

I heard the now dry Carlos muttering something to James as they came out of their room and helped me with our meal, as the girls changed in their room.

"Kendall?" Logan's voice sounded muffled threw the bathroom door.

"Yes?"

"I sort of forgot my towel, can you bring me one?"

"Sure. Wait a sec" I walked over to the closet in the hallway to grab a towel.

"Why don't you just come out, Logan? I'm sure Kendall would love to see you naked!" James yelled, a little too loudly. Carlos laughed.

"Shut up, James. Remember I'm still alone with your hair products and a very good-looking toilet" Logan warned. James squeaked.

"Good one" I said while knocking softly on the door. It opened a bit and Logan's hand came out so I could hand him the towel.

A few minutes later James, Carlos and me got breakfast ready. The girls finished getting ready for their day out and joined us at the overcrowded table. We just started eating when Logan came walking out of the bathroom with only the towel hanging, oh so lowly around his thin hips.

Of course I had seen him without shirt before. We sat whole days by the pool together, but never like _this._ This was hot, He was hot Very, very hot. You could see muscles that were normally hidden by his clothes. His hair was still wet and there were drops of water dripping on his chest. He was gorgeous.

"Kendall, you're catching flies" He said grinning. He clearly got the reaction he was hoping for. He walked into our bedroom. James and Carlos shared a quick, amused glance before raising their eyebrows at me. I blushed and turned my gaze to my plate. The food wasn't that tasteful anymore. Not after _Logan._

"I really have to, well, you know, I-" I almost ran to our shared room. The girls giggled while James and Carlos shouted not very appropriate things that I really didn't want to hear.

I pulled the door open and scared Logan shitless.

"Damn, Kendall, I –" I didn't let him finish, just slammed the door behind me and pushed Logan against it. I kissed him while stroking his sides. At first, Logan was to startled to react, but it didn't take long before he kissed me back, with as much passion as he could muster given his startled disposition from earlier and quickly lost himself in it. As soon as I was done with his mouth I moved to his neck.

"You can't" Kiss on his ear.

"Just walk into a room" Sucking on his ear lobe.

"Like that" Kiss to his pulse point. Logan's breathing sped up.

"And expect me to do nothing" I bit down hard and that's when I heard it, the most delicious, intoxicating noise I have ever heard. He moaned but it was full of so much pleasure it made my heart skip a beat. He pulled me closer while I continued sucking and licking the place. I returned to his lips and it didn't take long for Logan to open his mouth a bit, telling me he wanted more, and I was only happy to oblige. I won our little battle, as always, and Logan settled with wrapping his arms around my neck. We kissed for a while, until breathing became a problem and we had to stop.

"My waffle is probably cold by now" I said to his lips resting my forehead against his and looking him in his beautiful eyes.

"Not my fault" He smirked. He knew very well what the cause of this little make out was.

"Yes, it is" I kissed his nose. "Get a shirt. We'll go eat breakfast together."

He did as he was told and we walked back into the kitchen hand in hand. The girls were already gone and James was doing the dishes. He didn't even try to hide his huge grin. Carlos suddenly appeared behind us and studied Logan's neck.

"He has a hickey. Not a bad one, but still, I win James!" He said excited.

"You made a bet over…?" Asked Logan.

"About how far Kendall would take it" He said while pulling ten bucks out of his wallet and handing it to Carlos.

"You didn't think he would let me, did you?" I asked, feeling pretty good about impressing James freaking Diamond. The biggest flirt in the world.

"Let's face it. Logan's pretty uptight, conservative, I'm impressed" James said while smirking.

I gave a mock bow, "Why thank you"

That's when I realised Logan wasn't too happy about this conversation. No that was way to positive for his current state, He was fuming. "You talk as if I'm some kind of girl you're trying to impress" He said sarcastically. He walked to the table and threw some cold waffles on a plate, not once looking at me. "Feel more like an object than a person right now..." He muttered to his food.

I exchanged a glance with James, we always did this when one of us had a date. It really wasn't something new. Logan never said anything about it, but now I remember him not saying anything at all during one of those conversations. He always looked disgusted.

_Great move, Kendall! You just have him and you screw up already? Stupid Ass._

"I'm sorry, Logie. I didn't mean it like that" I took a few hesitantly steps in his way.

"It's just plain disrespectful. You're acting like I'm some kind of prize " He said irritated.

"I'm only acting like that because you are"

"Great way to say you're sorry, Kendall" _Sarcasm, crap I really screwed up!_ I didn't like it at all. I tried to put my hands on his shoulders, but he flinched and shrugged them of.

"Just hear me out, sweetie" I pleaded. I sounded so pathetic. He remained silent, waiting for me to continue. "You're like the biggest treasure ever found. I still can't believe I finally have you and I feel terrible for fighting you already. Definitely about something this small. I won't do it again. Promise" He turned around and looked at me coldly, before breaking into a smile.

"You're forgiven" He stopped me when I tried to hug him. _That hurt…_

"Not now. I have to get things ready for the prank war" He explained seeing my offended face. He gave me a quick peck before turning to face James and Carlos.

"Don't you dare following me" And with that he was gone.

**Preparation~Preparetion**

Logan came back around 5 pm. He was grinning widely and to be honest I was a little scared. If it wasn't for the fact Logan pranked himself every single year and not once made it to the final three. Something I was very grateful for. In this way I didn't have to prank him myself and I wouldn't have to kill James or Carlos for hurting Logan. Because they were right about one thing, I wouldn't let anything happen to Logan. _Just keep your hands of my Logan, bitches… _

However, this time it was almost looking like he actually made a plan. And Logan's plans were good. Really good. Which made it slightly more difficult for me not to worry about tomorrow.

His smile widened when he was looking at one of us, probably thinking about his plan.

"Kendall, please make him stop smiling. It scares me" Carlos whispered in my ear when we were all sitting at the table, eating whatever Carlos and James got us.

"No problem. Hey Logan!" I yelled. He looked up from Rachel, who he was having a talk with. As soon as I winked, he immediately started blushing. The smile replaced by a small grimace. Goal reached.

"Thanks, mate" Snickered Carlos.

"Anytime"

It didn't take Logan long to start smiling again and I loved it to much to make it disappear again. His eyes were sparkling In a way hadn't seen in months, so it's understandable that I found myself looking at it constantly. It was down-right adorable.

That night nothing special happened. We watched another movie and the girls decided to spend the night at home for once, so we could start the prank war as soon as we woke up. Without the girls, we suddenly had a lot of space on our isle of mattresses. Logan decided not to use it, he curled up to my chest. _Well, I certainly haven't got a problem with that…_

There was no way I was going to prank him tomorrow. I just couldn't. I loved him too much.

**Complete bullshit. This time it's important bullshit, though. Not like the last chapter which was just me loving making Logan blush. Next chapter will be very, very long. I've got someone that betters my mistakes, but if you find one, please tell me? I also think I use the words 'though' and 'however' too much, is this true? I still love reading your reviews, it makes me happy.**


	7. Hiding

**Hiding**

"LOGAN! I'm going to kill you! The Jeniffers aren't here!" Carlos screamed. He punched the door of the roof were I trapped him.

"Too bad, Carlos. You fell for it. Now, wait here until I've got James and Kendall. I'm not letting you help them. Oh, it's probably going to rain in a few hours. Have fun!" I yelled back. I was pretty proud at myself. My plan actually worked. I made it to the final three, which is a miracle. It was the first time I pranked someone and the person really fell for it! I knew this plan was going to work.

I walked back to 2J, hoping that James would be there. This morning I pulled a 'fake' prank on myself and now everyone thought they could trust me. This is why Carlos believed me immediately when I told him the Jeniffers were tanning on the roof, topless. Idiot.

"Have you seen Carlos?" Asked James when I walked in the door. He was busy doing something with duct-tape and bananas and I probably didn't want to know what his plan was. "I just know he's up to something. I haven't seen him all day! I wonder when he's gonna try something..."

"Yes, I saw him in the lobby. He said something about water and the roof? I didn't get it completely, but I really want you to win. Carlos will talk about it for years when he does" I said, pretending to be irritated. I saw James falling for my lie. _That's right, go to the roof..._

James smirked. "Thanks, Logie! I think I'm going to follow him and find out what he's up to" He grabbed his weapon (whipped cream spray) and went to search for Carlos. I sneaked after him, being as quiet as possible. James had his hand on the door handle and I was euphoric. It was working! I was finally going to win!

"I know you're following me, Logan" James said softly. I almost fell of the stairs. _Damn it!_

"I'll let you prank me, but first I want to talk to you"

**Hiding~Hiding**

My audition sucked. This would have been such a huge change! I really wanted this role very badly. I would be so jealous if Camille got it, although I had a main role on a TV-show and she still had nothing. I just didn't think she was a good actress. Not that I would ever tell her that, she was way too nice to me to ruin her like that. I needed her, she made me feel better about my acting skills. Since she had none. God, I was so mean! Not that I would tell anybody what I just thought...

I nodded to Bitters when I walked past him to the elevators. Already with one foot in the thing, I decided to take the stairs. A little exercise wouldn't hurt me. I ran up the stairs, taking two at a time. At the last one I was out of breath. I slowly climbed up.

When I reached the top, I didn't have time to catch my breath, since Logan was lying at the foot of the stairs to the roof. Blood on his head and obviously unconscious.

"Oh my gosh, Logan" I breathed. I fell on my knees next to him and felt for a pulse. I almost cried in relieve when I finally found it. I grabbed my mobile and called Kendall. He didn't answer.

_Of course not! Why would you make this easier? _I ran to the first door I saw and knocked on it impatiently. I was stunned that nobody had seen him lying here.

"Jo? What's wrong, honey?" Asked Tyler's mom worried. I stepped aside so she could see Logan's unconscious body. "Please call 911 and ask for an ambulance. I have to go find his friends. Can you stay with him?"

She nodded and went back inside her house to make the call. I started looking in 2J, but found it abandoned. I didn't waste time and ran to the lobby.

"Has anyone seen Kendall?" I yelled to the few people sitting on the chairs.

"At the park" Said Mr. Bitters bored, he didn't even look up from his puzzle.

Again, I didn't waste time but ran as fast as I could to the park. After what seemed like thousand years I finally found the blonde I was looking for. He was busy with soap, saran wrap and plastic bees and wasn't paying attention to anything else.

"KENDALL!" I screamed, trying to catch my breath when I stopped in front of him.

"Oh, hey Jo. How did your audition go?" He asked light-hearted.

"Logan fell of the stairs" I panted.

"Very funny. I'm not going to fall for that. You tell him to think of something more original if he wants to win from me" He returned his attention to his own prank.

"This isn't a joke! I found him unconscious with blood on his head. You think he would do something like this to prank you?" Kendall turned as white as a sheet when he realized I wasn't lying.

"Where?"

"By the stairs to the roof. I'll wait here for the ambulance" He started running to his injured love and I watched him going. I couldn't help but wish he would love me as much as he loved Logan. _As much as I love him..._

**Hiding~Hiding**

_Logan. Logan. Logan._

I pushed people out of my way when I ran as fast as I could through the lobby to the staircase.

_Logan. Logan. Logan._

First floor. I really needed to ran faster.

_Logan. Logan. Logan._

Second floor. I'm so slow. Even James is faster than I was and he's a lot heavier than me.

_Logan. Logan. Logan._

Third floor. Only one left Kendall, come on!

_Logan. Logan._ "Logan..." I whispered when I saw my boyfriend lying on his stomach, his face turned to the other side and the limbs on his left side in a very painful angle. The woman pacing next to him I recognized as Tyler's mother. She jumped when seeing me, I obviously scared her.

"Kendall! That's quick! I wasn't able to move him so I'm really glad you're already here! Be careful with his head, he has a large cut on it and I think his left arm and leg are broken. Poor boy, this must have been painful" She chattered on about how bad she felt for him, but I didn't listen anymore.

I kneeled besides Logan and gently turned him so I could pull him in my arms.

"Damn, Logie" I whispered shocked when I saw the cut on the left side on his face. I was very cautious, but I had no idea if I did a good job. He didn't wake up from the pain.

_Or he has so much pain he can't wake up… _

I pushed that thought away. That just couldn't be true. I took a better look. The cut wasn't deep, but very long. From his ear to his temple. His face looked extremely broken, thanks to the new wound and the old bruises from James' and Carlos' punches. I pulled him closer to my chest, being considerate with his probably broken left side limbs, and desperately trying not to cry.

Then I suddenly remembered my other two best friends, who didn't know what was going on. They had to know, but I had no idea where to find them. I gripped Logan tighter with my left arm, using the right to take my phone from my pocket. I dialled number 3, my shortcut for James and hoped Carlos was with him. I heard siren of the ambulance coming closer while I waited for James to answer.

-Hi Kendall-

"James! Where are you? Is Carlos with you?"

-We're both on the roof where Logan trapped us. Why?-

"How long ago? What time was that?"

-What? Why? Kendall, what's-

"Just answer my question!"

-An hour? Maybe on and a half? Something like that-

"Fuck. James he fell of the stairs to the roof"

-You realize I'm already pranked right? It isn't necessary to scare the shit out of me by saying something like that-

"JAMES! This isn't a joke! I would never lie about Logan being hurt!"

-No. No, you have to be joking-

"Well, I'm not. Logan is lying very unconscious is my arms and I momentarily hate you for wasting my time while I could have been doing something for the HALF DEAD BOY IN MY LAP"

-I... We.. I just... Kendall, we can't get out of here. You have to come and get us-

"I'm not leaving Logan, maybe when those freaking doctors finally arrive"

-How bad is it?-

"I have no clue"

-It will be okay, Kendall-

"I h-hope s-s-so, J-am-es"

I allowed a few tears to fall, before returning my attention back to Logan. I pulled him closer and rocked him in my arms careful to avoid the cut on his head. After what felt like hours but in reality was only minutes, I finally heard hasty footsteps coming closer. Two men in blue uniforms took Logan from me and lay him on a stretcher, searching for injuries.

"Can you wait for me? I want to go with him to the hospital" I said to the ambulance workers. One of them nodded and I run up the stairs to the roof. As soon as I opened the door, James and Carlos came running out almost jumping of the stairs to see how Logan was doing. I followed them quickly.

"Jesus, Logan…" Whispered Carlos, who had his eyes glued to the cut on his face. James said nothing, but looked like he was about to throw up. I remembered he hated blood and almost fainted when he saw it.

"We're ready" Said the paramedic with the blond hair while the other pushed the stretcher to the elevators. I pulled the keys out of my pockets and threw them to James, who got the hint and nodded before I ran of to follow Logan.

**Hiding~Hiding**

The ride to the hospital was short and Logan didn't wake up. Once at the hospital he was immediately rolled away to the Emergency room while I was told to go sit in the waiting room by the nurse at the reception desk. I fell down on the nearest chair I could find. Only thinking of Logan and desperately hoping he would be okay. How the hell did we go from a prank war to a hospital? And how could Logan fall? He never falls. Thanks to gymnastics he has amazing balance, he just didn't fall. He always managed to stay standing, both Physically and mentally.

Not even ten minutes later, James and Carlos came walking through the door. They were instantly by my side.

"What happened?" Asked Carlos confounded.

"I think he fell of the stairs when he trapped James on the roof. Jo found him and went straight to me after warning Tyler's mom" I said emotionlessly.

"Logan never falls. This is so weird. He's way to careful to fall. He just doesn't" Muttered Carlos, more to himself then to us.

That was exactly what I had been thinking. Logan only fell when he was pushed, but that couldn't be true. Who would push Logan off a stairs? Who would risk his live like that, because if I ever found out who did it I wouldn't hesitate to kill him or her. That's if he was pushed.

We were sitting in the waiting room for the longest hour and a half of my live, when finally a doctor came walking towards us.

"Logan Mitchell?" He asked. We nodded furiously.

"It's nothing really serious. Well it's serious, Just not life threateningly serious. He has a concussion, his left arm is broken in two places and his left shin has a crack. We splinted it then placed it in a cast. The cut in his face wasn't that deep so it didn't need stitches it should up just fine. Lastly he broke four ribs three on his left side, and one on the left side we have to keep a close watch on those so they don't puncture his lungs. He woke up half an hour ago and keeps asking for you, so I figured I should just get you to shut him up" He said with a small smile. "He is in room 134"

I walked straight in the direction the doctor gestured to, completely ignoring the man. James was right behind me and Carlos decided to be polite and thanked the doctor, before running after us.

Logan looked terrible. His face had a sick grey color and he seemed even smaller than usual. His wounded leg lay in a sling attached to the ceiling and his left arm lay close to his body over the sheets. He had a huge band-aid on the side of his face. Thankfully he didn't have any IV. Despite the pain he was clearly feeling, his face lit up when he saw us.

"Logan" I whispered. Not able to say anything else and my feet glued to the floor.

"Hey" He cracked. He frowned and cleared his throat.

"How are you doing?" Asked James when I didn't say a thing.

"Good" He said hoarsely. He shrank when he tried to smile. Liar.

"You're lying" Carlos stated who came up behind me and closed the door.

Logan pulled a face. "Fine. Maybe I have a little pain in my chest when I try to laugh, but that's all" He said stubbornly. Again, liar.

I was finally able to move and walked over to the bed to grab Logan's hand. Carlos sat down next to me and James sat across from us, on the other side of the bed.

"How could you fall?" Asked Carlos. "You never fall. It's impossible"

"That's not true. I fell before"

"That doesn't answer our question. How could you fall?" I asked determined.

He thought about it for a minute, surprise flickered in his eyes. "I didn't fall. I was-" He suddenly stopped and continued thinking deeply.

"Pushed?" Carlos said finishing his sentence. Logan didn't answer and just stared at some point behind us. He was such a horrible liar. Even without saying we could see we were right.

"You were pushed?" I whispered furiously. "Who, Logan?" NO ONE pushes my Logan of a stairs and gets away with it. Alive. Someone that hurt Logan could expect a slow and very painful dead.

"I… Have no idea" He answered. I heard James gasping for breath and Carlos growled pissed. Logan just looked scared. We scared him with our reactions. I felt the anger flow away to be replaced by sorrow and guilt.

"I can remember following James up the stairs to trap him on the roof with Carlos. When I did that I turned around to go downstairs and prank you when I felt two hands on my back"

Carlos gasped for air and James turned white as a sheet. I felt tears coming back to my eyes and quickly looked down. I didn't want to cry in front of my friends, no one but Logan had seen me that vulnerable and this wasn't the time to change that.

"What?" Logan asked suspiciously. I felt his gaze on me, but I still wasn't capable of looking up so he turned to Carlos. "Explain, please"

"You fell down both sets stairs, Logan. Two very hard, very stone sets of stairs with sharp edges and-" I heard James breathing in sharply and Carlos stopped talking.

"Oh" Was all Logan could say. He knew he fell of some stairs, but not how far down he fell. I shivered when I thought about it. This could have ended so much worse.

"Kendall. Look at me" He said abruptly. He must have noticed where I was thinking of. I really didn't want to, but I couldn't deny him anything either so I looked up to meet his eyes. The huge, warm, chocolate brown eyes that were, thankfully, still open. I tried to blink away as many tears as possible.

"I'm awake, right? This will all be healed in a few weeks. You don't have to worry about it" He said.

Making me smile a little bit and I rolled my eyes. "Says the worry wart. You're always worrying about everything"

"Yes, but I'm aloud to since I'm the smart one. Now, Carlos, can you go find some crayons? I don't like the color of the cast and I need you to draw on it" He said smiling. Carlos' face lit up like a child on Christmas morning and went off to find crayons. Logan turned to James.

"Could you-"

"Get the hell out of here so you can kiss your boyfriend?"

"-get drinks for the three of you?" Continued Logan as if he hadn't heard James.

"Sure, Logan. Have fun" He said sarcastically. I frowned at that and watched him going. There was something with James I couldn't put my finger on, I had to remember to ask him about it later.

"Get over here" Said Logan. He patted on his bed. I smiled weakly and sat down.

"Kiss me" I blinked my eyes a few time, surprised that Logan was giving me orders. Not that I had problems giving in to this one.

I kept it light. Tried to touch him as less as possible, not wanting to hurt him and give him more pain than he already had. I nibbled softly at his bottom lip, making him sigh while granting me access. He didn't even fight for dominance anymore, knowing I wouldn't let him win.

After a minute he was satisfied and let himself fall back against his pillow. I stroked his cheek softly with the back of my hand, he leaned back to my touch.

"I love you" I said, without even thinking about it.

Logan froze and his face got a look of pain on it from moving so suddenly.

"What? Did I hurt you?" I asked concerned.

"No, you didn't"

"Then what is it?"

"What you just said… I'm not going to say it back" He said regrettably.

"That's okay" I answered, desperately trying to hide the disappointment. But I wasn't that lucky.

"I would like to do so, but I'm not sure if I mean it in that way yet. I want to be certain when I say it, before I tell you things that may hurt you when it turns out untrue" He explained.

I chuckled. "I get it"

"Great. Kiss?" He asked innocently. His eyes twinkled. It was impossible not to do exactly what he asked. Besides, since when didn't I want to kiss _Logan_?

It wasn't the first time I noticed how good our lips matched together. Or our hands. Our his body against mine. Or…

We stopped when Carlos came back into the room with a huge container with crayons in every thinkable color. "I suddenly get why James told me to wait outside for a while. Otherwise I would have been here a million years ago"

"Thanks, James" Said Logan, when the pretty boy walked in after Carlos with three steaming cups in his hands. He smiled and nodded to Logan, but it wasn't really a happy one. Logan got a look of pity on his face, but quickly smiled when he saw I noticed. Then it turned pained.

"Ow, Carlos! A little less enthusiastic please" He hissed. Carlos attacked his leg with a bright yellow crayon and started to write endless stories on Logan's leg.

"Sorry" He said without looking up.

"Do you let some places untouched, Carlos? Kendall and I want to write on it as well!" Complained James.

"You take his arm, Logan said I could have his leg" Carlos stuck out his tongue to James.

"I never said-" Logan never finished that sentence. Carlos was looking at him with enormous, begging eyes. "Carlos gets the leg" He told us, not capable of denying anything to Carlos when he saw that look. Carlos beamed and continued his masterpiece.

"You know that this cast only stays on me for a week right?" Said Logan after seeing how much effort Carlos took in coloring on his leg.

"No problem! I'll just do it again on the next one!" He said cheerfully.

"Yeah, what about that? When are you allowed to go home? When can you walk normally again? Do we need a wheelchair?" I asked curiously. Logan's face dropped when he heard the word 'wheelchair'.

"I have to stay here tonight, the doctor wants to make sure my ribs won't collapse and stab my heart or lungs" He said regardless.

"That's possible?" I asked fearfully. I had no idea broken ribs could be that dangerous. James' face went white again and Carlos stopped drawing bees.

"It doesn't happen that much and it's very unlikely it will happen to me. I only broke four. That isn't that much" He shrugged. I rolled my eyes. Of course, cracking four ribs is nothing. He could only die from it.

"Next week they're going to check this" He pointed to his face. "And I have to rest a lot because of the concussion, but I refuse a wheelchair. I'll crawl if I have to, maybe crutches…" His voice died when he remembered he couldn't use those because of his arm.

"You're not going to crawl or hop or whatever, Logan. Not as long as we are here. I don't want you to fall again and break you neck this time" I said resolute.

"I'm not using a wheelchair" Logan said stubbornly. He narrowed his eyes at me, testing me. Hoping I would give in. Something I did fairly often when it came to something Logan wanted. Or didn't want.

"It's only for a week, after that you can walk again, well not really walk more like hobbling, but still. It's the wheelchair, or James and I are going to carry you everywhere" James nodded in agreement. I was glad he was with me on this point. Logan wouldn't be able to over talk both of us.

The injured boy seemed to realize we were not going to give in and looked uncomfortable.

"But-"

"No, buts this time, Logan" James was serious. There was something in his voice I couldn't find a place for. Logan glared at James.

"Fine" He spat. "Wheelchair" He mumbled defeated.

Carlos was listening with open mouth. "I have to remember this. The first time Logan didn't get exactly what he wanted from Kendal. This is history. I'm going to write it down!" He said happily. There wasn't much space left on Logan's leg, but Carlos managed to find an empty spot and started to write furiously.

"Have you called your mom already? And Gustavo?" Asked Logan suddenly.

"No! Shit! They'll flip! James you want to call Gustavo for me?" I begged.

"No way! I'll watch these two here" He smirked. "Good luck, buddy"

I groaned and glared at him. I gave Logan a quick kiss on his forehead and went to the nearby waiting room to call. First my mom.

-Hello?-

"Hi mom. It's Kendall"

-Hi honey. How are you guys?-

"Good. Well, now we are. I have to tell you something"

-What happened?"

"Logan fell of some stairs and is in the hospital now"

-No! How is he doing? Do I have to come back? I knew it couldn't be a good a good idea leaving four teenage boys alone for so long. Kendall-

"Chill mom. He's fine. He's awake and he talks. He broke his left arm and leg and some ribs. He has a concussion and a slightly big cut on his cheek, but it's nothing that isn't healed in a few weeks"

-Thank goodness. When is he going home? Are you three capable of taking care of him until I get back? I could-

"Mom, we're seventeen. We can take care of it. He's going home tomorrow, if anything happens anything at all we'll call you immediately"

-Fine then. Tell him I hope he gets better soon. Tell him he has to call me the moment he comes home tomorrow and ask him if he called his parents already-

"I will, mom. I love you. And Katie"

-Love you too, honey. Don't forget to call tomorrow-

"Again, I will. Bye, mom"

-Bye, Kendall-

I hung up and I decided to wait no longer and just call Gustavo. Something that was equal to committing suicide. I held the phone to my ear.

-What?-

"Hello to you too. I have to tell you something you won't like"

-I figured that out myself, you would never call just to annoy me with your small talk-

"Right. Logan fell of some stairs"

-I'M GONNA KILL HIM!-

"I don't think you have to. It wasn't an accident, he was pushed. Although he'll never admit it"

-Who did it?-

"He says he doesn't know. He never saw who it was"

-Bullshit, get it out of him. What are the injuries?-

"He broke his left arm, leg and a few of his ribs. He has a concussion and a cut in his face"

-He screwed up the whole scheme. How long is he out of business?-

"A few weeks, but I think it's going to take longer before the broken bones are healed. A month or two, at least"

-That's in your vacation. Next month he comes to the studio as always, he can still sing. He wouldn't be able to dance, but he can still do other things for Kelly or something-

"I'll tell him"

-Make sure to wish the dog a 'get better soon'-

"Wow. That's the first time you show you actually care about us. Or one of us, for that matter"

-He's my favorite dog. Not as annoying as the other three-

"I can't tell you I'm surprised. Logan's my favorite too"

-That's it? Or are you going to tell me James and Carlos are dead?-

"Nope, they're still very much alive"

-Then I'll see you in a few weeks-

He hung up before I could say goodbye and snickered softly. I walked back to Logan's room. All three of my friends were laughing when I stepped in.

"Big news! Gustavo didn't kill me! I have another surprise too" I said and sat back in my chair next to Logan's bed.

"He wishes you well and says you're his favorite dog" I told Logan and smiled when Logan's face lit up.

"I'm not surprised" Said Carlos and James together.

"So. You have to come to the studio when our holiday is over, even if you can't dance, Gustavo says you can do some work with Kelly. My mom said you have to call her as soon as you get home tomorrow. She wanted to know if we could take care of you until she gets back and if you called your parents yet" Logan's face dropped again at the thought of his parents. His father never paid attention to him, no matter how hard Logan tried. He was professor at some university and wasn't even home most of the time. He never called and I believe they hadn't talked for over a year. His mother, was also very busy with her job, but called him at least once a month. They weren't that close and the calls became less and less. We never talked about it, unless it was absolutely necessary.

"I called my mom, but she didn't answer. I left a message and asked if she could call me back when she had time. She'll tell my father, not that he actually cares" He said bitterly. He changed subjects. "Didn't your mom freak out completely?"

"It wasn't that bad. I convinced her that we could take care of you ourselves"

"Should I be scared?"

"Yup" We all said in unison.

The rest of the day we stayed with Logan. At six the girls arrived with pizza for everyone but Logan, who was only allowed to eat hospital food.

"Not fair" Pouted Logan. I couldn't handle seeing him sad so I fed him little pieces of my pizza secretly. It was only seven thirty when we noticed Logan fell asleep and we decided to leave. I left him a note and went home after that. Missing him already.

**Hiding~Hiding**

**My sweet Logan,**

**You fell asleep so we decided to let you rest and went home.**

**I'll come back first thing tomorrow and bring you breakfast that's edable **

**I'll bring you clothes and a toothbrush as well. I hope you're feeling better**

**by then. I love you,**

**Kendall**

**Hiding~Hiding**

I woke up at ten, because my phone rang. Someone must have left it there for me. Probably Kendall. It was a text from Camille. In Latin. I didn't even know she could speak that language too.

**From: Camille 22:00**

**Message: Scio impulit gradus ascendit (1)**

I frowned. How did she know? I hadn't told anybody. There were only two people who know and I'm sure we both kept our mouths shut. She couldn't tell anyone. It would ruin everything.

**From: Logan 22:02**

**Message: Quis? Tu dicis?(2)**

**From: Camille 22:05**

**Message: Non intellego cur non tibi. Quid itane est?(3)**

**From: Logan 22:07**

**Message: Non****expressa****.****Ego maiestate conterritus****cecidit****.****Nolo****amicum perderet****et dimittam****eifecit.****Promissum****dicas****alicui****(4)**

**From: Camille 22:11**

**Message: Quando facit quod****adnuntiem tibi.****Et****uno errore****descendere****.****Spero****vos****scitis****(5)**

**From: Logan 22:12**

**Message: Lorem(6)**

I hope she would keep her promise and wouldn't tell anyone. Kendall would kill him. I read his little note and couldn't do anything but grin. At that moment all I wanted was just to fall asleep in his arms. _But for now, _I yawned,_ his note enough _

1-I know who pushed you of the stairs

2-Who? Are you gonna tell people?

3-I didn't get why you didn't tell them yourself. Why did he do it anyways?

4-He didn't do it on purpose. It was an accident. I don't wanna lose his friendship and I'm not even mad at him, since he didn't do anything. Promise me you won't tell anybody

5-If he does something like this again I'm gonna tell people. One mistake and he goes down. I hope you know what you're doing

6-Thank you

**HUGE CHAPTER! But I'm happy about it, it's not as bad as I expected it to be. Did you like it? Please tell me! I have another question for you guys. I'm going to New York in october and is there something I really have to do there? I mean, who could I ask better than people who are actually from the States? **


	8. Satisfaction

**Satisfaction**

"Wake up, sleepy head. If got breakfast for you" Said Kendall who was stroking my good cheek softly.

"Hmflpgr" I said while trying to open my eyes but found out to be blinded by the light. I opened them a little bit and the first thing I saw was a grinning Kendall.

"You've slept a long time. We went home at seven thirty and it's now nine thirty, so that's fourteen hours. Did you read my note?"

"Ya, I woke up when the doctor came for a check up. Do you really have my toothbrush?" I asked hopefully.

"Yes, some clothes, too. But let's eat first and then I'll help you dress and everything so we can take you home"

I blushed. I did need help with my clothes. How low can you sink? Kendall luckily didn't see it, he was busy unpacking my breakfast. He reached out to give me a plate, but suddenly realized I wasn't able to hold it and eat with one hand. Something worse than not being able to dress yourself? Not being able to feed yourself. Kendall smiled widely when he realized what this meant.

"I suddenly found the perfect excuse to feed you" He said happily. You could say he had a lot of fun with this.

"Open up, Logie" He brought the fork with egg to my mouth.

"Greagfmphrp" I said. Kendall shoved the fork in my mouth before I could finish speaking. The result? I nearly choked and went bright red. Kendall just had more and more fun as this went on. Eventually I got used to it and just let Kendall have his little fun with feeding me. The doctor came with some papers I had to sign, before I could leave the hospital.

"So, how are we going to do this?" I asked Kendall when I sat up carefully and hung my legs over the edge of the bed. I felt uncomfortable in nothing but the hospital gown, I wasn't wearing anything underneath it.

"Simple" He lifted me up bridal style. He carried me to the bathroom and left so I could do some things I didn't need help with. Like using the toilet.

"Kendall? I need you help now!" I yelled through the door when I was done with everything besides dressing. I sat on the toilet lit and pushed the dress like cloth down as far as possible. It wasn't that effective. He came in and gave me a bag. I searched in it for a moment and then pulled out a set of boxers. I held it out to Kendall, who raised his eyebrows and tried not to smile.

"Tell me what you want me to do" He said.

"You'll have to pull it over the plaster, I can't reach there. Then you have to help me up so I can pull it up all the way" I said platonically.

Kendall grinned and had a very amused expression on his face, but did as I asked him to. He was very careful with me, helped me up and wrapped his arm around my waist preventing me from falling and for me to lean on. I gripped the waistband of the boxers with my one hand, but I simply wasn't able to pull it up. I gave up and looked helplessly at Kendall. He looked back with a mix of sympathy , love and fun in his eyes. _God, this is so humiliating…_

"I believe I can use some more help" I mumbled defeated.

So Kendall helped me with the last part and pulled up my boxers. His eyes never leaving mine. Only leaving his hands a little longer on my butt then nessecary. He smirked and I blushed some more.

"You should be proud of yourself" I said. "Just help me with this" I pulled at the ridiculous hospital gown thingy.

"As you wish" He answered. "Arms up"

Kendall got rid of it and threw it in some corner. He grabbed a shirt from the bag and pulled it over my head, just to repeat his previous actions. He made sure to touch my skin when he drew it down. He left his hands on my hips when my shirt was in place and took a step closer to me.

I met his eyes and the only thing I could read in them now was pure lust. We leaned in at the same moment. He was extremely sweet and soft, it was clear he wanted more, but he held back for me. He made sure I rested no weight on my broken leg and made me lean on him. He didn't held me as tight as he would, being considerate with my ribs. I finally broke the kiss.

"Help me with my pants so we can get out of here" I whispered to his lips. Kendall did his little trick with his fingers ones again, making me shiver.

"I can do the button myself, you know" I said to Kendall when he tried to close it.

"Show me then" He said and stepped aside.

Pulling the zipper went pretty well, but the button gave more problems. Kendall's grin got wider and wider when time past. After two minutes of desperately trying I gave up, again, and looked at Kendall helplessly, a-fucking-gain.

"You're cute" He said, kissing my nose and closing the button without even looking at it. He lifted me again. I grabbed the bag and we walked out of the room to the reception.

"Do you know where we can get a wheelchair?" Asked Kendall at the middle aged woman behind the counter. He turned to me when I groaned.

" No matter how badly I want to, I can't carry you the whole day, Logie" He said. "And you're not going to hop around" He added when I opened my mouth to argue with him.

"On the first floor by the exit. You have to give your name and address and bring the wheelchair back when it's no longer required. Have a nice day" Said the receptionist.

"Thank you" He answered. He carried me to the first floor and sat me in a chair while he took care of the whole wheelchair sign-in thing. He helped me in the horrible thing and chuckled about my unwillingness.

I was pouting all the way to the car. I couldn't even do so much as push myself up when we reached the BTR-mobile. I felt helpless and difficult and almost drowned in self-pity. Kendall, who else, helped me up and into the passenger side of the car. He folded the wheelchair and put it in the back.

I was grumpy the whole ride back, but Kendall chose to ignore it and kept talking to me as if nothing was wrong.

"Come on, Logan. Are you going to be like this all the week?" He asked when he stopped at the parking lot of the Palm Woods.

"Hmpfg" I said and sulked on because I wasn't even able to cross my arms.

"It's not that bad to accept some help some time. You can't do everything alone, sweetie" He whispered in my ear.

"I just think I'm going to irritate everyone, 'cause I can't do anything myself anymore" I admitted.

"Never. It wasn't your fault you got pushed off the stairs, was it? I don't mind at all to help you. It gives me the perfect excuse to be around you whole day!" He said happily.

"You're an ass, Knight" I said snickering.

"Just one that makes you laugh" He answered and kissed my cheek. "Let's go inside. James and Carlos have some things planned for you"

He got me out of the car and into the wheelchair. "Fine but I still hate this thing"

"I'll get you out of it the moment we're back in 2J" He promised and pushed me to said apartment.

"LOGAN!" Screamed James and Carlos when Kendall pushed me in. They both hugged me.

"We got all your favorite movies and all the candy you like" Yelled Carlos enthusiastically.

"And tonight Carlos and I are going to fish" Added James, a little less enthusiast.

"I don't wanna fish! It's pathetic and boring" Said Carlos angrily.

"We don't have to go fishing! We just have to get out of the apartment. God, it had to be subtle but you had to ruin it again" James said faking anger.

"Oh" Carlos looked sheepishly.

"Kendall?" I asked meaningful gesturing towards the wheelchair where I was still sitting in, much to my dismay. I tried to push myself up with my one useful arm. Carlos and James laughed at me, which earned them a glare. I stuck my arms out at Kendall when he came into my sight. He immediately reacted and lifted me out of the damn thing. He put me down on my good leg and held me close to make sure I wouldn't fall.

James and Carlos exchanged glances. "Oh Logan, I would do everything for you and I can't let go of you for one single minute. Break as much as you want, I'll always take care of you" James spoke dramatically, he pulled Carlos to his chest.

"Oh Kendall, never let go of me. I can't get enough of you. Thanks to you I'll turn into a walking tomato one day!" He said, looking at James as if he was god.

"So funny, guys" Said Kendall sarcastically and I hid my blushing face to his shoulder, something that made Carlos and James laugh even more. They had to hold on to each other so they wouldn't fall.

"Do you wanna get them back?" Whispered Kendall in my ear. I nodded against his chest.

His hand turned my face so he could kiss me as if his life depended on it. The kiss started softly, as always, but soon turned into something less innocent. I granted him access when he asked for it and sighed quietly. His tongue mapped out my whole mouth and had no intention ever going away. It was a little bit more than you would normally do around people. Especially when Kendall laid his hands on my ass.

"Dude!" Said Carlos.

"We get it Kendall! No more jokes about you and Logan. Can you stop this now, please?" Asked James anxious.

I tried to break the kiss when I heard that, but Kendall showed no signs of satisfaction yet. He still had his tongue in my mouth and refused to let me go. And… fuck it. It felt to good. We never let it come this far and I didn't want to stop already. Just not yet. I melted into the kiss and slid my hands under Kendall's shit over his stomach. He moaned and seemed to be totally oblivious to the two other people in this room. If they weren't vomiting in the toilet yet.

That's when we got a pillow against our heads. Kendall flinched and bit my tongue. Hard.

"Oh!" I yelled.

"Ahw, come on, Logan! It was just a pillow!" Said Carlos who thought I was overreacting.

"Kendaw 'it my tong'e" I said with difficulty.

"I'm sorry" He kissed my cheek and stared angrily at our two 'friends'.

"I'm gonna kill you" He said mad. He picked me up and lay me down on the couch before running after James and Carlos who were going up the stairs to their room. I amused myself quite good by looking at them running around and forgot the pain in my tongue. This was until I got a text from Camille.

**From: Camille 12:14  
><strong>**Message: Are you home? Is it okay if we come over? ****Qui dicebant vobis vos impulit?(1)**

"Is it okay if the girls come over?" I yelled to my friends upstairs.

Three voices yelled back. "YES!"

**From: Logan 12:17  
><strong>**Message: You can come. Promisisti nihil(2)**

Camille had to keep her promise. No one would ever forgive him if this came out. Especially Kendall, he was already feeding himself up about this. It seemed to me that I had to forgive him, since I was the victim. But it hadn't been done on purpose. He just surprised me by kissing me. Who would have seen that coming? I didn't. I had to have a talk with James.

1-Have you told them already?

2-No, and you promised you wouldn't

**It's so weird translating Latin to English! It has always been Latin-Dutch or the other way around. And my English teacher's a bitch. For real. She gave me a three(I think it's something like an E) on my book report! So unfair! I'm not that bad in English, am I?**


	9. Conversation

**Conversation**

"No, it's okay, Kendall. I want you to go" I insured him. He and Carlos were taking the girls to the local rink to teach them how to play hockey.

"James you'll stay here with me, right?" I asked sweetly. He looked like he was about to throw up.

"Yea, I need some help with math if I want to graduate next year and now is the best time since Logan can't do much else. And I can carry him everywhere he wants to go, so I think we'll survive together" He lied. He smiled his million-dollar-smile.

Camille was eyeing us worriedly. I gave her a warning look. She wasn't allowed to tell. It had to be a secret. It would be a secret forever, if it was up to me. Unless James tried something like this again.

"Then it's okay, I think. See you tonight, sweetie" Said Kendall happily. He kissed my forehead and then followed the others.

**From: Camille 14:00  
><strong>**Message: Spero vos scitis. Vorenus sentire nocentem aliquid factum(1)**

I growled and stared angrily at my phone. James obviously thought it had something to do with him, since he flinched and stepped back. Which was true, of course, but not in the way he thought. I wasn't mad at him.

"Sorry. Camille has been irritating me all day" I said regretful. James chuckled nervously.

"Why?" He asked, probably to distract me from the conversation we had to have, not knowing he fell right into it.

"Because Camille heard us talking yesterday. She only heard us fighting, but she concluded that you had to be the one who pushed me of the stairs, since you're the last person I had any kind of contact with. I wish she didn't know, this makes everything a lot more complicate" I explained. All the blood flooded out of James' face.

"I'm so sorry, Logan!" He whispered. "I had no idea that you fell! I felt so rejected that I wasn't thinking and just let go of you on top of the stairs, I wanted to be as far away from you as possible. I didn't even hear you fall. Carlos was yelling at me for being so stupid to let you prank me too and I didn't want to think of you anymore so I just…" His voice died slowly.

I gave him a sad smile. "It was an accident. I was never mad about it, I just lost my balance when I punched you. I've never been angry or anything about that. What we do have to talk about though, is that kiss. What the hell was that?"

"It was my way of showing you, that you have a choice" He said softly, not meeting my gaze. Apparently his shoes were much more interesting than I was.

"James… Listen, even if I had the same feelings for you as you have for me, we could never date each other. I don't know if you noticed, but Kendall is extremely possessive when it comes to me. I don't exactly know why. I only know that it would completely destroy him if I leave him. I have no clue how far he would take it if he found out I left him for his best friend, but I'm not going to find out. Ever. Thereby, I don't have the same feelings for you as I have for him" That was a little harsh. James got a look of pain on his face when he heard those words, but I just didn't know a gentle way to tell him and make sure he understands it.

"I already thought something like that" He mumbled bitterly. He finally met my eyes. "It's going to take a while, but hopefully I'll get over it someday. Just try… Just try to be a little considerate with me, okay? It's pretty painful seeing you two groping each other every single minute" His voice sounded stronger than first, but I still didn't trust it completely.

"I'll try" I said sadly. I stuck my arms out to him in the gesture that was normally only for Kendall. James made a noise that was either a sob or a laugh and sat down next to me so he could hug me. It was perhaps a little closer than you would expect two friends to get, but if it was what James needed then I had no problems with it.

"I'm so grateful you haven't told anything to Kendall and Carlos" He said when he let go of me.

"They don't have to know. I forgive you and that's what matters since I'm the injured one. I want to keep it like this, it will take a while before Kendall and Carlos stop asking who pushed me, but they'll get over it. I still don't like lying to them that much and I hope Camille keeps her word and doesn't tell anyone. She keeps texting me about it" I complained.

"Just, be careful with those texts? It would be pretty bad if Kendall was reading with you over your shoulder" Warned James.

I smirked. "He can't read them" I was very proud of this 'secret' language since not that much people could read it.

James raised an eyebrow. "A little more explanation…?"

"Camille and I are texting in Latin" I grinned when James' eyes almost rolled out of his head.

"You keep surprising me. When did you find time to learn that?"

"My father is a doctor, James(2). Earlier, it was required to speak Latin if you wanted to go to med school. So he talked to me in that language when I was younger, so that way I would learn Latin quicker. And I took a class at school, for like four years, so I nailed the language"

"I should pay better attention. Did you have any more subjects I don't know about""No, this was pretty much it"

"You still have to be careful, though. If Kendall or Carlos sees this, they'll know you keep secrets from them"

"I have a password on my inbox" I was very proud of that password. I thought I actually had a good one this time.

"You're absolutely horrible at passwords. Give me your phone" He said sternly.

I gave it to him and was really disappointed when he cracked it in almost a minute.

"It's too predictable. Try something new and just watch your phone a little better. Or just erase those messages"

"Fine" I pouted. That password had been genius. It wasn't good for my self-esteem James guessed it this quick.

James snickered softly. "Let's watch TV. Do you need anything?"

"No, I'm good"

We watched some stupid show for a while that gave me a headache. I was glad our conversation ended this well. The last thing I wanted was losing one of my friends over something like this. I felt James gazes at me every once in a while, but I didn't say anything of it. He just needed time. And I was planning on giving him just that. It would become slightly more difficult when Kendall and Carlos found out, though.

"Logan?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you have any idea what kind of reaction you get out of people?"

He got my attention. "You mean I bore them to death with my endless stream of useless facts? That they would love to strangle me after ten minutes? I'm very much aware of that effect, thank you" I chuckled.

"No, not that effect. I'm talking about the one quality that makes everyone you meet fall for you. How everybody loves you immediately. I've seen it happen many times, Logan. First Kendall, Camille, Rachel, Jo –she just likes Kendall more-, me, I even saw Carlos looking hungrily at you one time. Two weeks ago the blond cashier in the market, the pizza guy, Mr. Bitters' niece, all the girls at the Palm Woods! Katie is too young, but she adores you. And than I didn't even mention thousands of fans all over the world"

The worst thing about that story: James was dead serious. He wasn't even drunk. I gaped at him.

"You make it worse by acting like a lost puppy and walk after everybody that's nice to you. You're so devoted and nobody has problems with it, because nobody can resist you" James ended his monologue and met my eyes, grinning.

"You had no idea, did you?"

"…" I shook my head.

"Get used to it"

"I don't believe you"

"You go to the first person you see and he or she will tell you exactly what I just told you"

"Keep on dreaming, James" I said unbelievably.

"This is why Kendall is so possessive and overdose it by being protective all the time. You just said you didn't know why, but I think I have a pretty good idea"

"A little more explanation, please"

"Kendall has to watch people throw themselves at you all day. He has to show them you're taken, for his own sanity. I think I would have done the exact same thing in his situation"

Well, he had a point there. It was just really weird hearing from other people how much effect you have on other people.

"I need to process this"

James nodded and went back to watching TV. Which we did for the rest of the afternoon. We had fun together and I was happy about that. I hoped it helped James with his inappropriate feelings towards me. Besides a very awkward toilet-scène, everything went just fine. I had been scared he would avoid me.

At seven o'clock our friends came back with Chinese food.

"Logan!" Yelled Kendall as soon as he walked threw the door. The next thing I knew I almost rolled of the couch, because Kendall threw himself at me -notice the irony.

"Oh, Kendall. A little bit more careful, please" I said when I felt my ribs. "Where does this come from so suddenly?" I watched James hiding his face and walk away to the kitchen.

"I missed you" He whispered in my ear. I blushed.

"You've only been away for a few hours"

"So?"

"Then how… Never mind. I'm hungry, did you bring spring rolls?" I asked hopefully.

Kendall smirked and lifted me up. "Of course"

After diner, we played poker with potato Chips as stake.

"So you still have no idea who pushed you down the stairs?" Asked Jo.

I flinched at the question. I glanced at James and Camille. Camille was staring stoically at one point at the wall behind us and James had a difficult time not showing how scared he was.

"No, I have no clue" I said convincingly. Not.

_Shit, Shit, Shit! _Kendall had seen me glancing at James and Camille before answering and was paying a lot more attention than he had before. He studied my face and I saw that he noticed I didn't tell the truth.

"And James and Carlos? They only had been a few feet away from you when it happened" Said Jo, who clearly had no intention on letting the subject go.

"We heard nothing. Carlos was yelling at me for being so stupid as to let Logan prank me too" Said James stiff.

Camille glared at him. She really had to stop that! She wasn't as careful as she should be. I really wanted her to shut her mouth about this subject.

"You could have paid attention when you were walking up those stairs. You must have seen somebody standing there who could have pushed Logan" Snapped Carlos. He didn't like it that James made it seem as if it was his fault they didn't notice.

_But you can't see youself…_

"That's enough. You don't have to be mad at each other. Neither of you pushed Logan down the stairs" Soothed Rachel.

Camille laughed sarcastically. "Non industria(3)" She mumbled, making sure I was the only one who could hear it.

"Clausum(4)" I coughed. None of the others had noticed we we're actually talking to each other, besides James naturally.

"Are there no cameras by those stairs?" Asked Stephanie suddenly.

"No, there's just one that focuses on the door to the roof. You only see the people walking in and out" Said Carlos sadly. I relaxed visibly. Something that got me some weird looks from Kendall.

"Than our only hope is that the pusher decides to reveal himself" Said Camille. She raised an eyebrow, but didn't look at me or James.

"I hope so" Said Kendall defeated.

And with that our conversation ended. Carlos won the game and made sure everybody knew and remembered by going on and on about it. At finally, we just decided to go to sleep.

1-I hope you know what you're doing

2-In the Netherlands you still have to take Latin in High School before you can study for being a doctor. I'm just taking Latin for fun

3-You're kidding

4-Shut up

**First a really great thanks to Storylover158 for being so patient with me and doing an AMAZING JOB correcting all my terrible mistakes and giving me some of the best ideas for my story. Thank you so much. You're an angel.**

**Second, I have this mentor at school and he's gay. Ever since I started ready Kogan fanfiction and everything I haven't been able to look at him without laughing my ass off. He thinks it is because he's funny (he is, but it's not what I'm laughing about) Coolest teacher ever ^^**

**Third, I really love you guys for all your reviews on my story! It makes me wanting to write more, so you guys rock! **


	10. Seeking

**Seeking**

A week past by without anything significant happening. The girls kept spending the night with us and we had fun with them. Yesterday I went with Logan to the hospital for a check up and the new walking cast. It was adorable to see him struggling with it. Walking wasn't that easy anymore and I already had to catch him four times to prevent him from falling down. He loathed this even more than the carrying and I decided not to tell him he was cute, since he wouldn't take that very well.

I began to notice some thing. Like the fact that Camille hated James for some reason. Something that was very weird, they always interacted just fine. James was acting strange in generally. He was absent most of the time, physically and mentally. To the gym, visiting Rachel – which was suspicious since she was dating Jo's co-star-, doing some groceries. The moments he was with us, he ignored us completely and seemed lost in his thoughts. When I talked about it with Logan, he told me that James felt guilty for what happened. Something I found nonsense and wanted to make him talk about it, but Logan stopped me by saying it would be okay and that he had already talked to James. He was positive about this and ensured me he would be fine in a few weeks, but I had a feeling there was more to it. So, I paid more attention to what was happening around me.

Now, Carlos, Logan and I, where sitting by the pool. Carlos really wanted to go here and dragged Logan with him and since I was always with Logan, I had no idea what else I could do beside join them.

"Ha! I win again!" Said Carlos triumphantly. He and Logan were playing rock, paper, scissors. I played with them for a while, but it quickly got boring. I was always amazed how long the shorter boys could continue this game. I lay down for a while, enjoying the sun, but since I wasn't James and didn't care about my skin color at all, this also got me boring rather soon. I remembered a game I liked on Logan's phone. I leaned over to Logan's chair and sneaked my hand in his pocket.

He squeaked. "Kendall! What the heck are you doing?" He hissed, blushing furiously.

"I'm just taking your phone" I answered, pulling my hand with the device back.

"And what are you going to do with it?" He asked suspiciously. He tried to snatch it back, but I held it out of his reach.

"I just want to better my score on tap-tap" I said, wondering what else I could do with it, that Logan wouldn't like. What was he thinking I would do?

"Oh. Well, that's okay. Just don't go to my files or something" He said insecure. He turned to Carlos again.

Why was he so tense about me having his phone? What was the secret he had to keep from me? Why _would_ he keep secrets from me?

I just played the game and didn't do anything Logan told me not to, but he kept an eye on me. I played oblivious, I would search his phone when he slept. Something I did often the last few days. He still had headaches and walking with his injured leg began to take its toll on him. I locked eyes with Carlos and saw that he noticed Logan's odd behavior as well. _Correction: We would find out when he was asleep. _

After half an hour, the Latino announced he was hungry and we went back to the apartment. We were lucky. Logan was halfway his sandwich and had already difficulty keeping his eyes open. His injuries were really tiring him out, but he tried to hide it as much as possible.

I carried him to the couch and lay him down. He whispered something that sounded like 'thanks' and was fast asleep within minutes.

"What's it with the sudden protectiveness about his mobile? What's in it he doesn't want us to know about?" Asked Carlos softly in case Logan would hear him if he was still awake.

"I have no clue, but I'm planning on finding it out. Like, now" I walked back to Logan and got the phone from his pocket for the second time today.

"Good. Let's start with his text" I told Carlos. We sat down at the kitchen table and I lay the thing so we could both see it.

"He has a password" I said defeated. Carlos smirked.

"Logan's really bad with passwords. It took me and James an hour to crack the passwords on his school files. He was flabbergasted when we both got an A on our paper" Said Carlos ginning. He grabbed the phone and started to think of codes.

"No birthdates. Maybe names?" He mumbled to himself and puzzled on.

"Got it. 5363255" He said proudly.

"I'm very impressed. What does it say?" I asked stunned. Since when was Carlos this smart? To me it seemed pretty random numbers, but I was even worse with passwords than Logan.

"It's your name" He said not looking up from the display. It's not girly at all that I like it Logan has me as his password.

"Inbox… Okay, first few messages are from the day you… got together. You don't need to hear those" Said Carlos and moving on very fast. I didn't get into it.

"James, me, me, me, me, Camille, Jo, Camille, Camille, James, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you –Jesus Kendall, you're around him all day and you still manage to fill half his inbox?" Asked Carlos unbelievably.

"Doesn't matter right now. Go on" I said, avoiding his question.

Carlos kept searched. "Got it. Texts from Camille in a language I don't recognize AT ALL" He gave me the phone so I could see for myself. I didn't know this language either. It seemed like French or something.

"Do we have to call James? I'm sure he wants to know about this too" Carlos said.

"You go do that. I'll overwrite this so we still have it when Logan wakes up" I grabbed pen and paper from the counter. I wrote down the unusual words while I listened to Carlos' talk with James.

"Hi James! …Listen, we found some things in Logan's phone. We think it's about who pushed him of the stairs… You don't have to come back… No, that's okay… Yes, but hurry will you?"

He hung up and read over my shoulder.

"You really have some horrible handwriting" He told me when he tried to read the incomprehensible words written in my 'horrible' handwriting.

"We can't all write like Logan. Besides, yours is much worse than mine!"

"You're right. Just don't forget to write Logan's answers down too, we won't come that far if we don't know what he said to Camille about this"

"Yes sir"

**C:**** Scio ****qui ****impulit ****gradus ****ascendit**

**L : Quis****?****Tu ****dicis****?**

**C: ****No n****intellego cur****non ****tibi****.****Quid i****tane est?**

**L : Non ****expressa****.****Ego maiestate conterritus ****cecidit****. ****Nolo ****amicum perderet****et dimittam****eifecit.****Promissum ****dica s****alicui****.**

**C: ****Quando facit quod ****ad nuntiem tibi. ****Et****uno errore ****descendere****. ****Spero****vos ****scitis****.**

**L : Lorem**

James walked in the moment I was done writing.

"What did you find exactly?" He asked urgent. He came closer and took a look at the paper I had been writing on.

"Texts between Logan and Camille, we both don't know the language. Why would he do something like this if it isn't a secret?" Reasoned Carlos. "Put Logan's phone back in his pocket before he notices it's gone" He added.

"I'm gonna get my laptop so we can translate it. It seems French or something" Said James he went to his room and I slid the phone back in Logan's pocket.

James turned the laptop on and looked at the words on the note again. I started to think. Since when did Logan speak French? He probably had it in high school or something, I didn't know Logan's schedule all that well, but he had A LOT of subjects and it changed often. It was too easy, it was boring or he already knew everything about it, so he switched pretty often.

Logan had been taking quite a few languages, now that I thought about it. He mentioned Spanish once, because he wanted to know what Carlos was talking about to his family. His father spoke to him in Latin when he was home. It shouldn't surprise me he found time to learn French. Typically Logan.

"Translating websites. Spell the words for me, your handwriting is unreadable" Commanded James.

"So, now translate it" Said Carlos impatient when James finished typing the words. He clicked 'Translate'.

We waited an whole minute for the translation. That never came.

"Translation not possible! Bullshit!" Yelled Carlos. With bad results.

"What translation isn't possible?" Asked Logan sleepy. He scared the crap out of us. The still half-sleeping boy tried to sit up, but stopped when his body made an awkward angle. His face turned to pain again. "What are you guys doing?"

"Nothing special, Logan. Did you sleep well?" I asked innocently.

He gave me a weird look. When he answered he ignored my last question completely. "Does it have something to do with the fact my phone is in the wrong pocket?" He was irritated. And something else. Fear?

"Shit" I mumbled. Wrong pocket. Dumbass.

"Great move, mate" Said Carlos sarcastically.

"We just wanted to know why you and Camille were texting each other in French if you have nothing to hide"

"I don't get- wait, French?" He asked amused. He smirked. "Go ahead. Translate the texts"

"Who pushed you of the stairs Logan?" I said, using his distraction to my advantage.

"He didn't-" He stopped talking as soon as he realized his mistake.

"So you do know. Who was it, Logan? No games. We can just go to Camille if we want to know. This is what you to were talking about, isn't it? Those messages? Camille knows" I said angrily. Why would he protect that person? He pushed him from a fucking stairs! He could have died!

"I'm not gonna tell you. I forgave him. It was an accident, I wasn't even pushed!" Said Logan determined.

"Right. You weren't pushed. You just jumped of the stairs yourself?"

"I lost my balance!"

"Logan, stop this and just tell me who pushed you of the fucking stairs!" I yelled livid. Carlos jumped and bumped his knee when he stepped back.

"I'm not going to tell you" He stared at me. Challenging me.

"Then I'll ask Camille" I stood up.

"She not going to tell you anything" Logan wasn't completely sure about that, he still seemed afraid of it.

"Why not? I bet she wants to kill the guy just as much as I want to"

"She promised me"

"Who says she'll keep that one?"

"I'll kill her if she tells"

"As if she's scared of you! You're limp!" I had no idea where that came from, but I felt guilty instantly. His face dropped and the red scar on his cheek twisted like a snake. He looked away.

"I'm sorry, Logan. I didn't mean that" I said regretfully. I sat down next to him again and tried to hug him, but he leaned away and glared at me.

"Why don't you just leave me alone?" He snapped.

I tried to hide how much that hurt me and walked away without saying another word. Carlos was still standing by the table and was looking at me with wide eyes. I walked past him and stormed out of 2J.

**Seeking~Seeking**

That had been a little harsh. And mean. He just tried to help me, he had been helping me with everything for the last week, because I couldn't do anything. I really didn't mind him being around me all day. I even liked it. I was glad he was there for me and I certainly didn't want to upset him like this.

It only drove me insane, because he was pressuring me so much with his constant questions. I wasn't going to tell him. Or anyone. He just had to get that.

"He just wanted to help you, you know" Said Carlos who sat down on the other side of the couch.

"I know. I just wished he would see I'm not going to tell him. Camille isn't going to tell and the other person involved in this isn't going to tell either. It's better like this" I was determined. It was for the best.

"You don't really think that, I hope? How can you forgive someone who could have killed you?" Asked Carlos in disbelief.

"It wasn't his intention to make me fall! It was an accident! I have never been mad at him! I just told Kendall the exact same thing! Didn't you listen at all?" I growled. Carlos mustn't start this.

"Whatever. I'm going to talk to Camille" He stood up. "James is in his room if you need something"

"You go do that. She isn't going to tell you anything!" I yelled after him when he walked out of the apartment. I grabbed my phone and texted Camille.

**From: Logan 17:13**

**Message: Carlos venit tibi. ****Lorem nega(1)**

James came out of his room with a panicked expression on his face.

"I told them it was French and not Latin. I destroyed the note with the texts. We can just tell them you did it when I went to the bathroom or something. You think Camille keeps her promise?"

He sounded agitated. He sat down in the spot Carlos just left.

"I just warned her Carlos is coming to her. We'll find out soon if she's gonna tell or not"

James nodded. We were helpless. If Camille told Carlos we would have a huge problem. My phone rang.

**From: Camille 17:14 **

**Message: Odi te mentiri. I sermónem meum servábit.**

"She's not gonna tell him" I said relieved and James relaxed visibly. Not even ten minutes later Carlos came back, looking extremely frustrated.

"I have been talking to her for years, but she just said nothing! Not a single word! She kept her promise Logan. You're so annoying!" Carlos wasn't mad that often, but if he was he made sure to let everybody know. He sat down next to James and turned the TV on.

"Stephanie's dad is a cook. She's going to bring some leftovers from his restaurant" He announced after another ten minutes filled with awkward silence.

"Nice" Said James. Carlos glanced at him.

"Where are you standing in this?"

"I don't think Logan's going to tell us, so I think we should just try to translate those texts again and hope we'll find something new. But I also think we should respect his choice not to tell us" He said smoothly. I was very impressed. He would be a great actor.

"I ripped that note when James went to the bathroom" I lied. Playing along with James' plan.

"Damn it, Logan! You're making me crazy!" Yelled Carlos angrily. He ran out of the apartment again. Probably searching for Kendall.

**Seeking~Seeking**

That evening was tense. Stephanie brought way to much food, enough for the next two days. Kendall and Carlos came back together and stayed away from me. James had to play his role and pretended to be just as mad at me as Kendall and Carlos were. I felt kinda lonely.

The girls were sitting at the table with James, Carlos and Kendall and I sat alone on the couch. Kendall brought me a plate, but didn't sit with me.

"Problems in happy couple land?" Asked Jo sweetly. I noticed she was way too happy with that.

"Logan's being stubborn" He didn't look at me.

"Only because Kendall is pushy" It was an automatic reaction. I refused to take all the guilt.

"Aha" Said Jo, she shut up after she realized we didn't want to talk about it.

Everyone felt the tension. Kendall and Carlos weren't just ignoring me, but Camille also. Carlos definitely told the blonde about their talk and Camille was just as stubborn as I was. Rachel and Stephanie were the only ones who weren't affected by this. They made small talk about clothes and the new boy from 4B.

While the other were sitting at the table, I made a new folder for my texts with Camille. I had no idea why I didn't just erase them, but I had a feeling I had to save them. I remembered to make a new passwords, since Carlos and Kendall got the last one. After doing that I showered, for the first time without any help of Kendall. It took me hours to dress and undress myself and I still couldn't bend over so my feet and legs were still wet when I finally came out of the bathroom. Everyone was lying in the living room, watching a movie. The only empty spot was next to James so I started hobbling towards it. And failing miserably.

I fell halfway. Flat on my face. I hated this. The new cast didn't feel right, I couldn't walk with it, it was ugly and it itched. I kept stumbling around and if I fell I couldn't even push myself up, since I still couldn't use my left arm.

I heard Carlos and the girls laughing at me and I didn't even try to get up. I was drowning in self-pity again and was hoping to sunk into the floor.

"You can still ask for help, you know" Mumbled Kendall in my ear. He slid an arm around my waist and pulled me on my feet.

I turned around to wrap my arms around his neck. His hands stayed on my hips.

"I'm sorry" I whispered. He hugged me tighter and I could feel his smile. He kissed my ear and helped me walk back to the living room. He laid down and pulled me with him. I listened to his heartbeat, one of the best lullabies in the world_. Yes, I missed him._

1-Carlos is coming to you. Please don't say anything

2-I hate it to lie for you. But I'm keeping my word

**Complete crap. It sucked. There's just no excuse. So I have to read this book for English and it's a classic or something? The Catcher in the Rye, I believe. Is it good? I've like hundreds ideas for sequels to this story, but I don't even know when or how I want to finish this one… Any ideas? I also have to pull the rating up for a latter chapter I wrote. It's a cute one :)**


	11. Love

**Love**

The next morning was like many of the others. We ate breakfast together and discussed what we were going to do today. Jo and Rachel had auditions and would be back by tonight. Stephanie was going to visit her aunt in San Francisco and would be back the day after tomorrow. Camille and her mom were going to have some mother-daughter bonding time. So that left the guys for a day they were going to spend together. We decided on a doom hockey competition, in which we were only allowed to use one hand, since I had only one usable arm. I was winning, having some more experiences doing things with one hand I had developed some pretty fast reflexes. Carlos cheated and James panicked a lot, forgetting he was only allowed to use one hand and had to be everywhere at the same time. Kendall was the only one that kept his head focused and really had a chance against me, if he tried his best. He would have let me win if he hadn't been that competitive.

I won the one-to-one round and Kendall was second, something he wasn't very happy about. We made pairs for the second round.

"So me and James against you two?" I asked. "Best two out of three?"

"Sounds good, bring it on, Logie" Dared Carlos.

"Oh, I will" I answered back and we started to play.

James and I lost, but only because James cheated and used two hands instead of one, which got Kendall and Carlos three extra points.

"I at least won one time" Said Kendall happily. He pulled me in his lap and I let it happen until I saw James' gaze. I felt the crushing weight of what could only be described as guilt immediately.

"Kendall, do you mind letting me sit on an actual chair? It's hot here" I made up quickly. Kendall pouted, but let go of me very unwillingly.

We ate sausages for lunch. James managed to save them just in time. Carlos really was a terrible cook. He nearly turned them into charcoal.

At four thirty, Carlos found some beer in the bottom drawer in the refrigerator. Leftovers from the Truth or Dare night.

"Let's play 'I have never'" Suggested Carlos. He threw all of us a bottle and jumped on the couch next to James.

"I never had a dog" Said Kendall. James and Carlos drunk.

"I never pranked a teacher" I said. Carlos, James and Kendall drunk.

"I never had straight A's" Said Carlos. I was the only one who drunk.

"You just wanted to make me drink, didn't you?" I snickered.

"Yup"

"I've never been arrested" Said James. Carlos drunk.

"But your father is a cop!" Said Kendall incredulously.

"And he was the one who arrested me!" Yelled Carlos back.

"Why would someone arrest his own son?"

"Maybe because his son broke his window" Said Carlos ashamed. We laughed.

"I never saw a girl naked" Said Kendall. James, Carlos and I drunk.

"Who?" He asked curious.

James and I glanced at each other and tried not to laugh. "Carlos' sister"

"Dude! That's gross!" Cried Carlos. "Why my sister and not Kendall's?"

"Because Lola is older than us and we couldn't help that she was changing with the door of her room wide open! And Katie's ten! We're not pedophiles"

"And your sister is hot" I said seriously. 'Cause, well, she's hot. Kendall slapped the back of my head.

"I don't want you two looking at her ever again" Said Carlos strictly.

"I don't want you anywhere near her!"

"Jealous, Kendall?"

"No!"

"…" I quirked an eyebrow.

"Okay, maybe"

I Laughed at him, making him pout.

"Don't worry, I think you're hotter" I kissed his check.

"Lets move on!" Said James hasty. "I've never been slapped by Camille" Kendall and I drunk.

"I never copied a paper" I said. Kendall, Carlos and James drunk.

"I'm not surprised. Who's?" They grinned at each other and I eyed them suspiciously.

"Yours"

I rolled my eyes. Of course.

"I never kissed a guy" Said Carlos. Kendall, I and too my surprise even James took a sip.

"Seriously?" Asked Kendall curiously. "Who?"

_Oh god, if you would know…_

James didn't look at me. "Just some people at parties"

Carlos' phone rang, telling us he got a text. I wasn't paying that much attention to it and turned back to James.

"Cool" Said Kendall, still stunned.

Something changed. There was some unexplainable tension in the room I couldn't find the cause of. It scared me, the air seemed suddenly way too thick.

"I never ate an fly" Said James, but before anyone could take a drink, Carlos began to talk. His voice sounded plain, making me shiver.

"I never pushed someone of a set stairs"

Dead silence. That was it. Now everyone knows what's going on. Camille must have texted Carlos and broke her promise. Carlos knows. _Oh crap…_

"What's wrong, James?" Carlos spat out his name. "Not thirsty anymore?"

I could almost hear the click in Kendall's brain when he made the connection. His face went blank.

"Run" I hissed to James. He had been frozen in his spot. He was terrified. He didn't think twice about my command and ran out of 2J. Kendall went after him almost at the same time.

"Kendall, I don't want you to hit James" I yelled after him. He stopped at the door and laughed sarcastically.

"Hit him? No, Logie, I'm gonna fucking kill him" He growled. I took his announcement seriously, I could actually see him doing that.

"No you won't" I was serious too.

"WHY NOT? HE PUSHED YOU OF THE FUCKING STAIRS AND YOU'RE STILL PROTECTING HIM? YOU COULD HAVE DIED DAMNIT!" He screamed. He was furious out of his mind. I've never seen him this livid before. He slammed the door and walked back to the living room, stopping in front of me.

"What happened? And don't you dare leaving anything out, Logan!" He was literally pulling the hairs from his head.

"It was an accident" I whispered miserably. "He didn't even know I fell, because he turned around before he could see I lost my balance. I lost it after I hit him for trying to kis-" _Too much information! No one but me and James knew about that kiss!_ This was supposed to be going with us to the grave. Not even Camille knew about it. She only heard us fighting.

"You have got to be kidding me" He whispered with threw clenched teeth. Even Carlos flinched and backed off. Kendall seemed completely broken. He was crying. And I said nothing.

"Let me get this straight" He said in a chocked voice. "James kissed you. While he knows very well how I feel about you. The next thing he does, is letting you fall down the stairs. You, Logan, the one person I can't live without and then goes to sit on the roof with Carlos for an hour while you could have been dead? Why don't you just go to James right now so he can hurt you some more? Why don't you just dump me so you can kiss him as much as you like? You both clearly don't care about me at all" Tears were rolling down his cheeks.

"That's not true. What would you think that?" I grabbed his hand and pulled him to me. He let it happen and sat down next to me. I cupped his face in my hands and stroked the tears away with my thumbs. "I didn't kiss him back, Kendall. I punched him as soon as I realized what was happening"

Kendall slapped my hands away from his face and turned it away. "Why do I think you don't give a shit for me? Maybe because my 'best friend' kisses my boyfriend? Or maybe because my boyfriend protects said friend from me when he pushed you? How can you do that when you don't have any feelings for that person? How can you do that? How can you forgive someone something like that so easily?"

"I protected him, because it was an accident. I lost balance. James didn't even see it, because he already turned around. And about that kiss… he's our friend, Kendall. He made a mistake. We already talked about it and I told him I don't return his feelings and don't want to be more than his friend. I've got you"

Kendall laughed sarcastically. "You don't accidently let one of your friends fall down the stairs and walk away as if nothing happened. And you clearly feel more for him than you tell me. You don't forgive someone that could have killed you this quick if you don't like that someone" He said broken.

And now I was angry. "Listen to me! I lost my balance! He didn't push me, it was an accident! That kiss meant nothing to me, because I have you. I want you. You know why?"

He said nothing and refused to look at me. Everything in the room was more interesting than I was.

"Look at me"

He just didn't do it. I had to put everything in keeping calm.

"Look. At. Me"

He jerked his head up and finally met my eyes. His bright, green eyes were dark and watery. I could see pain, anger, disappointment in them. It broke my heart.

I lay my hands on his face again. He leaned to my touch and a few new tears left his eyes.

"I love you" I said softly. I kissed him tenderly. Trying to tell him as much of that feeling with the light touch of my lips. When I looked at him again a part of the pain made place for hope and the disappointment disappeared completely.

Then something happened I never expected. I had no idea how he would react to my confession, but I certainly didn't think he would start cry uncontrollably. He was sobbing badly and his whole body shacked and trembled. I couldn't think on what to do, just hugged him.

"Shh. You don't have to cry, I meant it" I whispered in his ear, rubbing circles on his back. I kept comforting him, whispering soothing words in his ear, after the first ten minutes of crying like this.

I saw Carlos looking at us with wide eyes. He was sitting in the corner under the slide. He had many emotions on his face. Anger and pain for what James did to me. He was shocked and scared for seeing Kendall breaking down like this, he was certainly feeling uncomfortable for hearing me say those words for the first time. It didn't feel right for him attending such an intimate moment.

Then there were some emotions I couldn't find the cause of. He seemed lonely. He felt betrayed. He was jealous. I studied his face while I continued easing my sobbing boyfriend and tried to figure out what he was feeling exactly and why. I thought I had a pretty good idea when Kendall's sobbing turned into hick ups. He slowly relaxed until he fell asleep on my shoulder.

I turned my attention to Carlos and looked in his eyes for a while. "Come here" I said and gestured to the empty place next to me. I slowly brought the sleeping boys head to my lap, trying not to wake him before looking at Carlos.

He was sitting next to me quietly and was staring at his hands. I hoped I was right about my conclusions about his feeling, because I had no idea what else good be wrong with him. Unfortunately there was only one way to find out.

"You're not going to be alone, you know" He looked up, surprised. "Even if James doesn't return your feel- even if you don't forgive James, we'll never just leave you by yourself. Friends come first and even if Kendall is both to me that doesn't mean I'll, no we'll, just stop being friends with you. If you decided not to forgive James, you won't become the third wheel. I refuse to let that happen. It wasn't our intention to make you feel rejected. If James knew you would react like this he would never told me he had a thing for me. He would be too scared to hurt you in the process_" Please, please, please let me be right about this!_

"How'd you know that was my problem?" He asked ashamed. He shaked his head, focusing on what mattered again. "What if James doesn't think the same? What if he doesn't feel the same way?"

"Then he's blind and I'm going to hit him again" I said. I stroked Kendall's hair.

"When did you become so aggressive" He laughed.

"Only with James. You remember that time I made him loose the feeling in his arm? That was awesome" I said elated. I almost hit myself. Carlos distracted me. "But seriously, talk to him. He clearly missed something and he would never hurt you like this on purpose. None of us, but especially not you. James just forgot who was always there for him. We just have to help him remember that you're his favorite before all of this happened-"

"No one here has favorites-" Protested Carlos.

"We so do, but it doesn't matter. Kendall has always been my favorite and I'm his. James is yours and you are James'. It's painful he chooses me over you and he has to see how badly he hurt you with that" I said decisively.

Carlos met my eyes again and the one tear rolling over his cheek said just as much as the thousands Kendall cried. It was as if he just now realized how true my words were. My hand left Kendall's hair and pulled Carlos to my other shoulder. Carlos however didn't cry anymore, it didn't take long for him to fall asleep as well.

**KA-BOOM. Finally, Logan told Kendall he loves him. But why was Kendall crying? Do you guys want Carlos and James together? I would like to know, but I think I'll still do what I want with them. *Laughs evilly* I want to thank you guys for reviewing and adding my story to story alerts/favorites. It means a lot (: **


	12. Explanation

**So, my beta left me. Anyone who wants to help me out? I really hope I didn't make that much mistakes! The rating has to go up for this one. It's not really bad stuff, but still has an adult theme.**

**I still want to thank Storylover158 for helping me so far.**

**Excuses**

**From: Logan 18:23**

**Message: They're sleeping. Get back here so we can talk**

Two minutes later he sneaked back in the apartment. He was super silent and smiled a bit when he saw me sitting with Kendall's head in my lap and Carlos' on my shoulder. I met his eyes, but didn't return his smile. I nodded my head to the coffee table and he sat down on it.

"I'm not gonna lie. You screwed up" I said prompt. His face dropped.

"How badly?" He ask cramped.

"Kendall freaked out. He was so furious and then became really insecure and afraid that I felt something for you. I told him I loved him" James' face dropped again, but I didn't feel sorry for him this time. I went on. "I believe that calmed him down. No, that's not the right word. He has been crying for half an hour before falling asleep so I have no clue what he thinks. He's just mad and hurt about all the things you could expect from everyone in his situation. He doesn't get why you would hurt me, he doesn't seem to get it had been an accident that you haven't touched me at all. He'll get over this eventually, when he realizes it was an accident. The kiss, well, he isn't going to forget about that move. He doesn't understand why you would do that to him"

I watched the blonde in my lap and pulled the hair out of his face. His eyes were still red and there were trails from the tears on his cheeks. He crunched his forehead a little when I touched him, but didn't wake up from it.

I looked back at the pretty boy. He seemed incredibly guilty. I know I was going to make it so much worse when I told him about Carlos. _Well, I'm not gonna let him wait…_

"Carlos has it much worse, even if he stood completely out of this situation. You betrayed him, James. He always thought, that if you would fall for one of us, it would be him. He likes you, he didn't say it in those words, but I thinks he meant it that way. You committed high treason by liking me. I told him that even if he wouldn't forgive you, he's not going to be the third wheel, the same counts for you if you decide to hurt him some more and pull a 'Logan'. We saw how that ended. Please don't try to deny you don't like him back, cause you do. You love him. You two have been so close since Kendall and I started dating" James turned more and more pained when I went on. I was glad to see he was taking responsibility for his actions. He stayed silent for a while. He was thinking deeply about what I just told him.

"What should I do, Logan?" He asked at last. He seemed to get strength from the fact he hurt his friends this much. It made me smile a little. _There's James again… _

"Talk to Kendall first. Tell him you're sorry. I don't think you can do more for him than that. He'll go away after that to think about it and I'm going with him, unless Carlos wants me to stay. Just don't say anything to Carlos about what I told you, wait until he starts about it. He wouldn't take it very well if he found out I told you, and I'm done fighting for a while. I just want everything to get normal again" James nodded. He seemed determined about setting this right. Something I was very happy about.  
>"Go make dinner or something. I'm hungry and maybe it'll calm them down a bit"<p>

James rolled his eyes. Not believing me at all. Which wasn't that strange, since it would take so much more to calm them down 'a bit'. He did what I asked him too and made some PB and J sandwiches.

After an hour of waiting, Kendall groaned softly and fluttered his eyes open. He smiled a little when he saw me and sat up. Then he remembered what happened.

"This wasn't a nightmare, was it?" He asked coldly.

"No, just don't kill him, okay? He wants to talk" I begged. Kendall saw James, who stood in the kitchen watching us hesitantly, and narrowed his eyes.

"Fine. But only because of you" He growled. He pulled me to his chest, still glaring at James. I thought this was Kendall's way of showing him he wouldn't let me go anymore. James didn't try to hide the pain he had when he saw us like that anymore, maybe Kendall would forgive him easier if he shower he regretted everything and was still hurting for being turned down by me. When Kendall did this, he woke up Carlos, who's head fell of my shoulder when Kendall pulled me backwards.

The Latino didn't even say anything, he just stood up and walked to his room. The only way we could know he was still angry was because he slammed the door. Hard.

James flinched and brushed his hand through his hair in frustration and guilt. He inhaled deeply and then walked towards us. He sat down on the coffee table and looked straight at Kendall. _Damn, he got guts…_

"I'm sorry, Kendall" He blurted out. "I shouldn't have kissed Logan. It was the biggest mistake of my live. Not only got I turned down, big time, I also made him fall of the stairs. You have no idea how guilty I felt when you called me that day. How guilty I'm still feeling, how badly I wished I could switch places with him. I regret every single thing I've done that day, but there's no real excuse for it. I'm so, so sorry. For hurting you like this. For hurting Logan, for hurting Carlos while he doesn't even play a part in this. For starting this big mess and ruining a friendship I value more than my life. I'm sorry, Kendall"

Kendall's arms tightened around me, preventing himself from attacking James. "You decided to kiss Logan and the make him fall. Why James? Friends don't try to steal your friends boyfriend. You just don't do it. Do you have any idea what I would have done if I lost Logan? If he broke his neck and died when he fall of the stairs? I honestly would have killed myself, since I don't see point in living in a world without Logan in any form. It would be bearable if he broke up with me or something, as long as he's alive and happy I don't give a fuck. I'm not going to forgive you this easily. I completely lost all trust and confidence I had in you. He's mine, James. Try something like this again and I won't let Logan stop me. Whatever the consequences are"

James doesn't answer. He stares at Kendall with open mouth, trying to process what he just said. I couldn't blame him, I was speechless too. Kendall scared me shitless. Was I really that important to him? If what he said was true, I couldn't see myself ever breaking up with him. I would be way too scared he would do something to hurt himself. I already knew he loved me, he told me and showed it with every touch, every look, every gesture, every word he said. And I loved him back, but this much? He wouldn't live without me… The thought alone was terrible. I couldn't imagine a world without him. He couldn't just do that! Even if I died for whatever reason he had to stay here. I wouldn't just leave the world if he died, what was the point of that? It was bad enough to lose one of us, why would you make the people you leave behind suffer some more by killing yourself too? I had to talk to him about this.

James was still stunned. He didn't know how to respond to this. He met my eyes, desperately seeking for help, but I was just as clueless as he was.

"Just go talk to Carlos" Said Kendall heavily. James nodded, still unable to pronounce words and went to the room he and Carlos shared.

Kendall pulled me in his lap, holding me there really tightly, occasionally kissing my head or face while we just sat there for a while.

"You have to make me a promise" I said suddenly, surprising myself.

"Everything" _Oh, he meant it… _

"If I die for whatever reason, you're not allowed to commit suicide" I told him.

"And then what? Living on without you? I'm not even going to try that, Logie. Everything I have means nothing I f I can't share it with you. This world would mean nothing to me if you weren't walking on it"

"Just promise me, okay? I don't want to be responsible for that, for making your mom bury her own son. Would you like it if I just killed myself when you died?"

"No!"

"There you go. Promise me"

"But-"

"Damn it, Kendall! Just don't do that to me!"

He slammed his lips to mine. Desperately kissing my bruising mouth. "I promise" He whispered against my lips, not opening his eyes and keeping my head in place. I still didn't believe him totally, but I let it go. For now.

I kissed him again. "You know" I mumbled. Kissing him some more.

"This is our first kiss" I moaned when I felt Kendall's hands sliding under my shirt over my back.

"Since I told you I love you" And all of a sudden the hands and his lips were gone. I looked at him and smiled when I saw him beaming.

"I really thought I dreamed that part. It was too good to be true; or to fit in this whole drama" The grin on his face was very welcome after all the tears.

"It wasn't a dream. I do love you' He glowed even brighter than the sun.

"I love you, too" He told me, grazing his lips over mine sweetly.

"Then why did you cry so badly?" I asked curiously.

"You surprised me. I thought you were going to leave me or something for being so extreme with things. And because of all what was said before that. I loathe fighting with you"

"Hmm. What are you gonna do about James?"

His jaw stiffened. "I need some time to think about that. Until I know if I forgive him I'll just ignore him. I hope he doesn't screw up with Carlos, 'cause I'll have to hit him then"

"Is there something else I can do for you?"

"You could make out with me"

"Then we'll do that. Wait a sec" Kendall watched curiously when I pulled out my phone and started to sent texts. Two, exactly.

"What are you doing?" He asked confused.

"Telling the girls they should stay away tonight and saying to Camille I'm not going to forgive her for telling Carlos about this"

"Funny, I'm going to do the exact opposite. Thank her for telling us"

"I hate her. She promised me she shut up about it"

"Sooner or later we would have figured it out, you or James would have slipped something. Or Carlos and I found the right way to translate those texts. I can't say I'm glad I know, wait, I'm glad I know who did it, but I'm not very happy about who did it" He shook his head. "You distracted me. Let's make out"

"So impatient" I giggled softly. He leaned back on the couch until he lay on his back and I was on top of him.

"You know it" He grabbed the back of my neck, pulling me down so he could smash our lips together. He flipped us over when he noticed I couldn't hold myself up on one arm and straddled my waist. He kissed me passionately, next to the normal sweetness that I always found in our kisses. He bit my bottom lip, making me sigh and opened my mouth for his tongue that mapped out my whole mouth. I decided to bring our little make out session a little further and started to undo the buttons of his shirt, something that was quite hard since I could only use one hand, but I managed it. My hands pulled the fabric from his shoulder and he sat up to help me, before attacking my mouth again. I admired the muscles on his upper body and ran my fingers over them. I loved to feel them tense under my touch. His hands were playing with the hem of my shirt, I got the hint and leaned up a bit so he could pull it over my head. I put my hand in his hair and pulled softly at the blond strands.

"God, Logan" He breathed. He started to suck softly on my neck, kissing and licking his way to my pulse point and biting down softly, making me moan. He shifted his hips a bit creating some friction between our private parts. Although it felt good, I wasn't sure if I wanted to go there already.

"Kendall I don't want to go that far yet. Not here, not now" He whispered in his ear while he continued his assault on my neck.

"I know. That's okay, can I continue what I already did?" He explained it by thrusting his hips against mine again. I whimpered.

"Sure" I breathed. I certainly was okay with _that._

He slowly moved his hips against mine, rubbing our clothed erections together until I grinded back against him and we found a steady rhythm. We were both panting and I felt myself coming closer and closer to release. Kendall obviously noticed this and sped up our pace, which earned him a moan from me that sounded suspiciously much like his name. We came at the same moment. His eyes never left mine and stared lovingly down at me. He kissed me before laying down next to me to recover from our orgasms.

"Thanks" He said after a few minutes. He turned on his side so he could see my face.

"For what?"

"Letting me do that"

"You needed it. And I can't tell you I didn't enjoy it"

He chuckled softly and grabbed our shirts. "We should clean up before James and Carlos are done talking" He said helping me up.

"I hope they didn't hear us"

"You can forget about that" He said laughing. We walked into our room and turned our back to each other so we could change.

"Why?" I asked suspiciously.

"Because you were loud. Like really loud" He said, very amused.

I blushed madly. "Great"

**What do you think?**


	13. Confusion

**So, something from James' POV. Two chapters in one hour! Lucky bastards! Tell me what you think, I love reading your reviews. **

**Confusion**

Two weeks had past by and everything was incredibly tense. We still had two weeks until Mrs. Knight and Katie came back from Minnesota and I just wanted everything back to normal. Kendall has been taking Logan out almost every day and I thought it was to avoid me. It still hurt so much to see them so happy together, but I was happy for them. The pain became less and less and now it didn't hurt as much as it did at first, but there was still pain. Logan had been really considerate around me and tried to keep the touching and kissing to a minim as much as possible.

Let's just say that Kendall wasn't very happy about this and glared at me every time Logan didn't let him do what he wanted. The blonde hasn't talked to me since the day he found out I kissed Logan. The only time when he acknowledged me was when he was glaring at me for said reason. At first, he didn't even want to be in the same room as me, but that changed a week ago. I had been very happy about that, because it showed he was starting to forgive me. Three days ago, he even said my name aloud, something he hadn't done in a while. He acknowledged me when he made dinner and cooked for four people, instead of three. I thought Logan was behind that one, because the first time Kendall only made dinner for three, Logan gave his food to me and didn't eat anything at all. Tall, blond and eyebrows wasn't very pleased with me about that one, but ever since then he made dinner for four, if only to make Logan eat.

Today, there was some major progress. The four of us were sitting at the breakfast table eating the pancakes Logan made –he could use his left arm again, if he was careful. The girls didn't come back here after Logan yelled at Camille for breaking her promise. Carlos, Kendall and I moved the mattress back to their place and everyone slept in his own bed again. Or I should say Kendall, Logan and Carlos did and I slept on the couch.

"James, can you give me the syrup?" Asked Kendall calmly. We were all shocked. I stared at him with wide eyes and he raised an eyebrow.

"I'm still waiting, you know" He said after a minute. I shook my head and gave him the little bottle. Logan was grinning widely and seemed very relieved.

Carlos was the only one who didn't show any kind of emotion. He hadn't showed any since he slammed the door two weeks ago. He has been avoiding me even more than Kendall. Sometimes the three of them went out together or Carlos did something with Stephanie. There were however times he just disappeared. No one could find him then, but he always came back after a few hours. If Logan asked him about it he just shrugged and walked away. I only saw him when we ate and I felt really bad about that. I've been pretty lonely, since all of this came out. I always hung out with Carlos when Kendall and Logan were together and I hated it I lost him like this. I thought back to our conversation.

**BEGIN FLASBACK**

"_Why? Why would you just do that to them?" He asked me. "You know how much Kendall loves Logan, why would you break him like that? Don't you care about him at all?"_

"_That's not it Carlos. I love you guys like brothers, and I just recently found out about the feeling I've for Logan. I just wanted to let him know about that"_

"_By kissing him? Why didn't you just tell him?"_

"_I tried, but he didn't believe me. You have to remember we were in the middle of a prank war and he thought I was pranking him. The only way to make him see that I was serious was by kissing him. With horrible consequences. I really didn't push him, he truly lost balance after he hit me and I didn't see it happen because I was desperately trying to hide my face and stormed on the roof were you started to yell at me"_

"_I get that. But why him, James? Did I do something wrong?"_

"_What? No! What do you mean exactly?" _

_He said nothing. He turned around and sat down on his bed, elbows on his knees and face in his hands. I hesitated, but eventually decided to sit down next to him. I lay a hand on his back._

"_If you don't tell me what's wrong, what you meant with those words, I've no idea how I can help you" I said softly._

_He didn't look up. "I just… You know, since our friends started dating we have been spending a lot of time together and I don't get why you would hang out with me, if you liked Logan more. That hurts James. I don't want to be second choice. 'I can't get, Logan? Well, then I'll settle with Carlos', because that's how it feels. I always thought, that if you would ever fall for one of us, it would be me" I was stunned after that sentence, it was exactly what Logan told me earlier. It was as if the genius could read minds or something. Carlos went on. "Because Logan's right about one thing; we do have favorites between our little group and you're mine. I always thought I was yours and it hurts like hell you choose Logan over me, especially since you know Logan would never choose you"_

"_If I had known you would feel like this I wouldn't have done this. I just had no idea"_

"_I like you. A lot. But I don't know why I still do, if you do something like this. I never thought you would go this low, but for some reason I can't stay mad at you very long"_

_That was the moment I pulled 'the Logan', only not as mean."I don't think I like you back like that"_

"_So you'd rather stay alone feeling sorry for yourself for not getting the one you want, then actually try to be with someone who actually has feelings for you? And I thought I was tactless. Why not, James? Why don't you just try being with me? Am I that bad?"_

"_I can't! I just, I can't be with you! I don't know, I'm so confused right now! I still like Logan in very sick ways and then you all tell me this and Kendall's gonna kill me if I screw up again and I just don't know what's happening here anymore! I can't, Carlos. I'm so sorry"_

**END FLASHBACK**

After that we haven't talked once. I was getting anxious, what if I made the wrong choice? What if I could be with Carlos? What if Logan was right and I did love him like that, but I didn't even know it myself? What if I ruined everything I ever had with Carlos? It had been building up for the past two weeks and I was going to explode if I didn't do anything about it. I was certain that if I didn't hurry up, Carlos would just go away or something. The tension between the band had been immense.

That's when I made my decision. I walked back to the apartment, I had been in the park, just walking around and I was positive Carlos was home. I went faster, determined on what I was going to do.

I slammed the door open, making my three friends inside jump. They had been sitting at the table, but as soon as Carlos saw me he stood up and tried to get away from me by fleeing to our room.

"Oh no, you don't! Don't you run away from my again!" I ran to him and grabbed his arm, turning him around.

"What the fuck are you doing? Let go of me!" He growled.

"Never again" And with that I kissed him. I let go of his arm and lay my hands on his waist. I heard Kendall gasping for air and remembered he had no idea what had been going on. Carlos was stunned. He stood completely frozen in place, eyes wide open in shock, but didn't push me away either. He slowly melted and kissed me back and I was in heaven. If I had known kissing Carlos would be this good, I would have done it years ago. It felt like I was on fire, slowly winning in force and overwhelming me totally. It wasn't even a very special kiss. It was messy and uncontrolled, but so satisfying.

I pulled away and looked in his eyes. "Let's just try, please?"

He was looking at me, deep in thoughts. His face slowly lit up into the grin I knew so well, the one he had on his face when he was planning some new stunt.

"Three conditions" He said sternly.

"I'll do anything and everything" I said. I meant it. Because really, I would do everything and anything to stop this mess.

"You never do something like this again"

"Promise"

"You ask me out properly"

"Carlos?" I asked.

"What?" He was really confused.

"You want to go out with me tonight?"

He gloated, not expecting that at all. "I'd love to" He whispered.

"Good. What's number three?"

"Kiss me"

And I did, doing everything perfectly this time. Kissing his lips softly, but I soon found out Carlos wasn't the soft and sweet type and liked it a little rougher. Which I gave him willingly, making it the most passionate kiss that I could muster.

When we pulled away again I remembered we weren't alone. I looked up to my two other friends.

Logan was almost jumping from excitement, he was almost as happy about this as Carlos was. Kendall was staring at us like we were aliens. "Can someone please explain to me what the hell is going on?" He asked breathlessly.

"You seriously haven't told him?" Carlos asked Logan incredulously.

"He didn't ask me about it" Logan shrugged.

"So this complete mess between the two of you could have been solved with a single kiss?" Asked Kendall in disbelief. "You're such idiots! I've been worried sick! I just…hmpf!" He grabbed Logan and walked out of the apartment. The shorter brunette rolled his eyes at us, but followed the blonde.

"He approves" I said to Carlos.

"I know. Where are we going tonight?"

**What do you think?**


	14. Arranging

**Arranging**

Kendall and I were at the hospital for the final check up. After this one I would be completely allowed to do everything I wanted. The casts would be gone and I could walk normally again. I still shouldn't dance and everything with my ribs, but I didn't really care about that. My headaches were almost completely gone and I felt better than ever.

Kendall definitely noticed this and was very amused by my enthusiasm. He was sitting on a chair in a corner while the nurse was doing some last things, signing forms and everything.

"You're free to go. Be careful, though. If it hurts again, you should come back so we can keep an eye on it. You're ribs could be more damaged than we thought. Don't do anything dangerous and stay calm for the next few weeks, then there should be no problems. Have a nice day, boys" She quickly walked off. She probably has a busy schedule.

"Walk to me" Demanded Kendall. He held out his arms and smiled.

I rolled my eyes and slid of the bed. Hesitantly, I took a step and smiled when I didn't feel any pain at all. I took another step and then another until I was walking normally again and almost ran to Kendall.

"God that feels good" I said happily. "Can I drive home?"

Kendall laughed. "Sure, sweetie"

We went to the car and I claimed the driver's seat instantly. We drove home, while making small talk. We still got one week of freedom left and I wanted to do something before Mrs. Knight and Katie came home. We never actually talked about it, we just felt out how far we could go with each other. About this, however, we had to talk.

For a while, I had been feeling that Kendall wanted more than what we have done so far. After our little-more-than-a-make-out-session on the couch on the night Kendall found out James kissed me, we had some more of those 'situations'. He didn't want to push me, but Kendall was most certainly getting sexually frustrated. I really had no idea how I should bring this up, I was way too shy to just tell him I wanted to go further.

Kendall noticed I have been drifting off, but didn't ask me about it. He knew I would tell him what was on my mind eventually. He softly sang You're Beautiful from James Blunt when it came on the radio. I was wondering why he knew the song so well. I mean, it is like four years old already and he never listens to this kind of music.

"How come you know the lyrics?" I asked curiously at the end of the song. I'd been waiting to ask him about it until it end, because I still loved listening to his voice too much to interrupt him.

"It's about you" He admitted quietly. "I used to listen to it before I told you how I felt"

I blushed again. "I'm flattered" He leaned over the seat and kissed my cheek.

"Everything about that song represents exactly how I felt back then. Only you lived with me, you weren't just someone I saw once" When we had to stop for red light, I grabbed his hand and held it in mine the rest of the ride home.

We walked back to 2J, where James and Carlos were playing doom hockey together. We pretty much didn't notice any signs of a relationship with them. They were just acting like normal, the only differences were that they spent a lot more time in their room together and touched each other more than before. They weren't that affectionate and clingy all the time like Kendall was.

"Hey, Logan! You can walk normally again!" Shouted Carlos. He had taken a quick look before fully concentrating on his game again.

"Yes, it's pretty awesome" I answered, but I didn't get any respond. They were too focused on their game. So I turned to Kendall.

"I want to talk to you" I said nervously.

"You finally gonna tell me what's been on your mind?"

"Pretty much" I mumbled while leading him to our room. I wasn't going to start the conversation. I couldn't, simply because I wasn't brave enough. Instead, I just kissed him as soon as the door closed. Kendall was surprised, but went with it and kissed me back. I parted my lips for his tongue and slowly walked back to my bed, mine was the closest. I pulled him down with me when I fell back. I wanted to kiss him again, but he stopped me. Looking down at me with concern in his eyes.

"I thought you wanted to talk?" He asked.

"I do. I just don't know how to start this particular conversation"

"You'll have to start at some point. I can't smell what you're thinking"

"I was pretty much showing you what I wanted to talk about" I blushed and didn't look at him. When I finally did he seemed still confused.

I inhaled deeply. "Sex, Kendall"

"Well, that wasn't hard, was it?" He asked amused.

"You knew?"

"Duh"

"You're an ass. Why did you make me say it if you knew exactly what I wanted to talk to you about?" He lay down next to me and spooned around me.

"Because I wanted you to know you can tell everything to me"

"Right"

"So you want to take that step?"

"Yeah"

"You sure?"

"I guess"

"We're not doing anything if you're not certain about this" He said strictly. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck.

"I know you want to and I think it's time for me to do something back for you, because you have done an awful lot of things for me lately. Let's just say it's my way to say thank you"

"While that means very much to me, I don't want you to do something you're not ready for. I'm not going to forgive myself if I make you do something you'll regret later"

"I'm not. Why would I regret you?"

"…"

"I want to, Kendall. Preferably before your mom comes back, because that would make it a little bit more difficult"

"But that's next week!"

"Then you better plan a date, Mr. Knight"

"You sure?"

"Kendall, if you don't stop asking that all the time, I'm out. I'll stay a virgin for life"

"You're a virgin?" He asked surprised.

"Yes. Why were you surprised?"

"I don't know. I think I just didn't expect you to say that"

"Are you?"

"I am…?"

"A virgin?"

"Yes, sweetie"

"Good" I snuggled closer to his chest, wanting to feel more body heat.

"So we're really going to do this?"

"Yes. Now shut up about it"

"One last thing"

"Spill"

"It's about sex between two guys…"

"You can top, Kendall" He sighed in relieve, but tried to hide it as much as possible.

"You sur-"

"Kendall, I swear. One more time and I'm going to strangle you"

"Fine. I just wanted to be sure. It's going to hurt, you know"

"I know. And thank you, but I think it will be worth the pain"

"I'll make sure of it"

"I love you"

"I love you too, sweetie"

I smiled. I still loved the nickname. Kendall wrapped his arms around me tighter and pulled up the sheets when he felt me shiver. I didn't even notice I fell asleep.

When Logan was fast asleep I climbed out of the bed and went back to the living room. I still had some talking to do with James and Carlos for not telling me what had been going on. It had been four days ago, but I still hadn't managed to get them talking to me without Logan. I hoped this wouldn't take long, because after our talk I had to arrange some things for my date with Logan. I decided on the last day before my family came back. Then I had to get to do some research on sex, but I was pretty sure we needed condoms -not that Logan could get pregnant- and lube. I was sure we didn't have those articles at home, or maybe James… But I wasn't going to ask _James._ I still hadn't forgiven him yet and it's just weird.

I stood at the top of swirly and I definitely wasn't prepared to see this. James and Carlos were no longer playing doom hockey and were standing completely tangled with each other, eating faces. They had been so platonic all the time and this was the first time I had seen them kiss since the day they got together. I decided not to disturb them and first go out to get buy the things I needed.

Carlos saw me when I walked to the hallway to get my shoes. I heard a pop –gross- when he stopped kissing James.

"I'm sorry you had to see that" He blushed. "Where are you going?"

"I've to get some- I mean, I've to do some things for my date with Logan next week. I want you two out of the apartment, by the way" I finished my first shoe.

"Why?" Asked James curiously.

"I'll forgive you if I don't have to answer that question and you just take that him out so you're not getting in my way" I smiled lightly at him. I had missed James.

He grinned back. "Deal"

"Great. Well, continue you're… uhm, just continue whatever you were doing. Logan is sleeping, please don't wake him up"

"Okay"

"Later" I stepped out the door, just before the door closed I heard James and Carlos saying something. "They're so going to have sex"

**How was this?**


	15. Adoration

**Adoration**

It was the last day before Katie and Mama Knight came back. I was a little nervous. I've been waiting all week for Kendall to make a move. We hadn't done anything at all, the only thing I got were a few kisses. He refused to take it further than that and I was starting to get impatient. I finally gave him what he wanted, and he goes about and does nothing with it. That wasn't true. He had been very mysterious sometimes. He would just go out without telling me where he was going or avoid my questions, it frustrated me to no end.

I woke up in a very funny situation. I was lying on Kendall's chest and by that I mean, my whole body spread out of his. One of my legs lay between his and I noticed the thing that made this so funny. He was hard. _Let's tease a little…_

"Hi" I said innocently when I opened my eyes and met his.

"Morning, sweetie" He said, looking uncomfortable.

"Do you have any idea how I got like this?" I asked, planning my next move.

"I've seriously no idea, but I would like you to get off me so I can go to the bathroom" He said trying to get me moving.

"You really have no clue?" I asked evilly, moving the leg between his a little.

He bit back a moan. "I really need to go to the bathroom, Logie. Can you please get off me?"

"But you're a great mattress Kendall. I don't want to move yet" I moved my leg again, adding a little more pressure to his erection. He whimpered softly, he certainly knew by now what I was doing.

"You really have to stop this, Logan" He said pathetically.

"What?" I asked innocently, repeating my leg moving.

"That!" He almost yelled, frustrated in so many ways.

"You mean this?" I smiled evilly and moved my leg again.

He was panting and I had the most fun since days. "Yes that! Now stop it, will you!"

I made my best puppy dog eyes. "But why? It's so much fun!" I pouted, making him go insane with another leg movement. He groaned and flipped us over, pinning my wrists above my head.

"You're making me crazy, you know that?" He asked, gripping my arms in one hand and caressing my cheek with the other.

"You ruined my fun" I pouted more, sticking my bottom lip out a bit.

"God, Logan, stop this or I'll just forget about my plan and fuck you now" He growled, warning me.

"I don't see the problem" I said matter-of-factly, because I didn't have any problems with that at all.

"Now you don't. But you really will regret turning down my plan. And I would have done everything for nothing" He tempted me, making me curious.

It worked. "What are we going to do?"

"Can't tell you. I'm going to shower now and then I'm out. I'll get you around six, alright?" He had that glint of mischief in his eyes that could make me do anything.

"So you'll leave me here all day?"

"Pretty much" He saw my face. "Don't pout, sweetie. I'll see you tonight"

He gave me a kiss and then got up, releasing my wrists. He grabbed some clothes and walked out of our room. I sighed and rolled to my side, if I was going to be alone all day I wasn't going to get up anytime soon. I mean, what could I do all day, besides sitting with James and Carlos who will hate for stealing their make out time. I didn't want to admit it, but I don't understand them. And that's a first. Carlos and James were together constantly, but didn't touch each other at all with other people in the room. Not even a single kiss or holding hands or a hug. Nothing. Kendall told me about the time he walked in on them, but otherwise I would seriously doubt if there was a relationship between those two. They were probably just shy.

So, when I finally got up an hour later I certainly wasn't expecting Carlos on James' lap feeding each other. I stopped walking for moment, shocked and amused by the scene in front of me, but got over it quickly and sat down across from them grabbing a bowl and milk. "Moring"

I definitely scared them, James dropped the spoon and Carlos fell backwards, only to be caught just in time by the taller. They were both blushing furiously and Carlos quickly moved to another chair.

"You don't have to stop, because I'm here" I said amused. Very hard trying not to laugh. "Never seen you two this couple-ish before. I'm very glad to know I'm not the only blusher"

That got me a glare from James and Carlos. I started to question their ability to speak.

"I've been seriously doubting your relationship, you never see anything of it. It's not bad, but I still have to get used to see you guys like that" I started to eat, not expecting an answer since they both seemed to lack of voices.

"We just don't like doing thing like that around other people, you and Kendall do enough of that" Said James obviously insecure.

"We're not just other people, James. We're your friends. I don't mind seeing you kiss every once in a while" I shrugged. Continuing to eat my cereal.

"We know, Logan. Thanks" I noticed Carlos eyeing James suspiciously when the latter smiled at me, was he jealous? _Oh, yes, he was… _

I decided to change the subject. "So you know what Kendall's doing now? Or has been doing all week?"

James and Carlos smirked at each other. "Can't tell you, Logie. Sorry" Said Carlos.

"Bullshit. Just tell me what he's been planning!"

"Nope. We got instructions, though"

"What kind of instructions?" I asked confused.

"This" They ran around the table and each grabbed one of my arms and started to force me to the bathroom. I was to surprised to react quick enough which resulted in them locking me in.

"What the hell guys!"

"You have to shower and I'll get you clothes. We'll leave in an hour"

"And then what? Kendall's not coming back until six! You can't leave me in here all day!"

"I lied!" yelled Kendall. "I have to fix some things here and needed you out of the way"

"So you're gonna lock me in the bathroom? Great way to start your plan, Kendall. IT PISSES ME OFF!"

I shouted while trying to open the door again.

"You're going to love it. Just take a long shower and get dressed in the clothes James gives you. And fix your hair. It's only for an hour, sweetie. Maybe two" He said from the other side of the door.

I gave in. "You better make this worth it, Knight"

"You're not going to regret this, Logie. Go get ready"

**Adoration~Adoration**

"Are you ready?"

"YES KENDALL! I HAVE BEEN READY FOR AN HOUR!" I had been bored as hell. He hadn't said anything to me all day he's kept me locked in the bathroom.

"Good. I'm ready too" The lock clicked and the door swung open. Kendall was leaning against the doorpost. Smug grin on his face and looking amazing. Green matched his eyes perfectly. "You're looking good"

I blushed –Seriously, when wasn't I? "I… was going to say the same"

"Why thank you. Are you going to stand there all day or do you want to go with me?"

"Depends, what are we going to do?" I asked taking a step closer.

He took a step towards me too. "Can't tell you. Would completely ruin the surprise"

"I hate surprises when they're coming from you" Another step.

"You won't hate this one" He put his arms on my hips and I closed the last space between us.

"We'll see about that" I whispered to his mouth before kissing him. He parted my lips with his tongue and explored my mouth. When I tried to slip my hands under his shirt he stopped.

"Tonight, I promise" He said and gave me a last peck.

**Adoration~Adoration**

"You remembered this place?" I asked surprised when I recognized the little restaurant we have only been once before. We have been on the beach all day, just walking and talking around. I had no idea where he was taking me, but I vaguely remembered it from something. One year ago the four of us went to the beach and got horrible lost. We found this little promenade and the best Italian restaurant I've even been too. I cursed myself for not remembering the street name or even the name of the place. I didn't know Kendall knew.

"Of course! You didn't stop talking about this place for six weeks! It was impossible to forget, so I did some research and found it. At first I thought it would be a great birthday present, but this is a special occasion" He opened the door for me.

"This is a special occasion?" I asked surprised.

He didn't respond, but told the hostess his name. She let us to the balcony, which had the most amazing view at the beach and the sunset. You could hear the waves and children playing, over the sound of mews. There were flowers and candles on every available space and it was absolutely, wonderfully romantic. _Girl._

Kendall was being a gentleman and shoved my chair so I could sit down. He sat down across from me and the waitress asked us what we wanted to drink. We ordered and she left us alone.

"Why exactly is this a special occasion?" I asked again, because I really wanted to know the answer.

"Because James and Carlos are on a date tonight so we have the whole apartment to ourselves. We'll be able to do what we discussed a little while ago" He grinned when he saw the blush on my face. "I wanted to make it memorable. Today is also the day I first met you thirteen years ago"

"Seriously?" I asked incredulously. Normally I was the one who remembered things like that, but I had no idea what the exact date was we met. Of course I remembered everything that happened that day.

"Yes, sweetie. I asked mom. So, I wanted to make this day unforgettable. I like this day the most, next to your birthday and our anniversary" He grabbed my hand and laced our fingers.

"You're being way too good for me. Don't forget to add your birthday to that list"

"Everything for you. My birthday isn't half as important as yours, though"

"You should shut up about me being more important then you. 'Cause I don't like it"

The waitress came back with our drinks and the menus and we stopped talking for a minute to make our choice. Mine was made quickly. I never forgot about the lasagna I ate here and wanted to taste it again. It was heaven.

I people watched for a while Kendall was still deciding on his dinner. I saw something highly interesting. "Look" I said while pointing at the pier where two very familiar girls were kissing each other.

"Are that Rachel and Camille? Kissing?" Asked Kendall unbelievably.

"I think so. Wow, that's so weird!"

"Yeah it is! Well, if Stephanie and Jo get together I'm never kissing you again"

"No! You can't make a promise like that!"

"As if it would ever happen!"

"It's going to happen now you cursed it!"

"It was just a joke, sweetie. I like kissing you too much to give it up" His thumb flattered the back of my hand.

"I know that" I muttered. He smiled and continued the movement of his thumb.

"You remember the day we met?" He asked quietly.

"No I don't" I said sarcastically. As if I would ever forget the day I met KENDALL FUCKING KNIGHT.

"You're mean" He squeezed my hand softly.

"I remember James calling _you _a meanie when you tried to steal his friend from him"

"Well, yeah, of course I did that! I wanted you too. Besides, he tried to steal Carlos from me first, but I certainly didn't slap him! He was just claiming you all for himself. It took ages before he started to share you, but it was definitely worth waiting for" He brought my hand to his mouth and kissed my knuckles. I earned a smile when I blushed again. He let go of my hand when the waitress brought us our dinner and he needed his hand to eat it. He tangled our legs under the table.

I watched him closely while we were eating. He seemed nervous about something and couldn't stop shifting in his seat. Every few minutes he glanced at the sun and it was somehow impossible for him to focus on a conversation, but I didn't really mind. He was just too cute when his voice trembled a bit. So I played dumb and didn't confront him about it. He would talk to me when he was ready for it.

It became ten times worse during dessert. We shared a bowl of ice-cream and, but he couldn't stop his hand from shaking and made a completely mess on the tablecloth. Eventually he gave up and watched me finishing it. When I took the last spoon he looked at the sun a last time –it almost touched the water- and inhaled deeply.

"So, it was my intention to make this night unforgettable" He began nervously.

"That's working" I told him patiently.

"Really?" He grinned widely before shaking his head and focusing on his matter again. "That's great. So, well. You know… I ehm" He fiddled with his jacket and took out a little dark blue box and put it in front of me. "I got you something"

_Obviously. _I almost said it out loud, but stopped myself from ruining this moment just in time. "That's sweet of you, but you didn't have to" I really was flattered by this and tried to hide the eagerness to keep my last piece of manliness.

"Logan I'm almost dying of anxiousness here. Just open it already"

"Why? It's not like you're asking me to marry you or something, right?"

"No! I mean it's not that I don't want to- Just open it already!"

I was shocked about that confession, but I would deal with that later. I eyed him suspiciously while I grabbed the little box and opened it. I went numb.

There were lying two things in the soft, silk inside. The first ornament was a bracelet. It was silver and the cord matched the other object perfectly. In the middle it had a little plate with our initials engraved on the front side and the date of today on the backside. The second jewel was a necklace with the same cord as the bracelet's, but instead of a plate there hung a little heart with K+L engraved. It was beautiful. I loved it so much I couldn't even speak.

"You can choose. I'll wear the other one, but you don't have to of course. Just tell me if it's too soon or too much and I'll bring them back or keep it somewhere until you want it or I could just…" His voice died when he saw me standing up. He was looking really scared. Afraid he pushed me away that I didn't want anything to do with him ever again. Terrified that I would run away.

I was still speechless and did the only other thing I could do to tell him I loved it. I walked over to him and slammed my lips on his, kissing him as if my life depended on it. Or maybe his.

He was still tense, so I kissed my way to his ear. "I absolutely love it. Thank you" I whispered.

He relaxed and scooted his chair back so he could pull me on his lap.

"I love you"

"I love you, too, sweetie"

I leaned over the table to pick up the little box. I pulled out the necklace and held it out to him. "You'll have to help me" I explained when I say his confused face. He hung it around my neck and I put the bracelet on his wrist.

"Look" Kendall pointed to the sun.

"Sunset. You're timing is precious. I wondered why you'd been looking at it all the time!"

"Everything for you, sweetie"

"You remember Carlos saying it would sizzle when it touch the water?"

"Let's find out" He wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You're cheesy"

"You love it"

"I do"

We watched the sunset together. I rested my head against his and every so often Kendall would whisper something sweet in my ear or kiss me. After that Kendall paid and we walked back to the car. Now, it was my time to be nervous. I knew I agreed to this. I even brought it up myself! It just scared me. What if I did something wrong? What if it hurt too much and we had to stop? What if it was so bad Kendall would break up with me? Were we really ready for this?

"You OK?" Kendall asked quietly.

"Y-yeah" I stuttered. He smiled softly, but didn't go into it and grabbed my hand.

The ride home was silent. I became more and more nervous. When we turned into the parking lot of the Palm Woods I thought I was dying. Kendall's arm was around my waist when we walked back to 2J. He hugged me from behind when he'd closed the door behind us and pressed little kisses to my neck and shoulders.

"Relax, sweetie" He mumbled in my hair. "We'll stop whenever you want. I'll still love you. Just forget everything; it's only us right now. Whatever happens tonight my feelings for you won't change" He continued his kissing my neck until he felt me relax and then turned around so I could reach his lips. He smirked when I opened my mouth a little for his tongue. I slipped my hands under his shirt and traced his abs. He moaned and deepened our kiss. His hands travelled down to my ass and stayed there. He gave me a hint be squeezing lightly. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist which created some very interesting friction between our manhood's. We moaned both and he pulled me closer, he walked us to our bedroom. His mouth never leaving mine. I jumped of him when we entered the room and looked around in awe. There were a few changes. He pushed our beds together to make one and hung Christmas lights above it. On the bedside table lie condoms, lube and toilet paper. I had to remember to ask him about that later.

"You like it?" He hugged me from behind again and grinded against my butt.

"I lo-ve it" I stuttered. One of Kendall's hands sneaked south to cup the bulge in my pants. "You're shirt is bothering me"

"Then get rid of it" I didn't even have to say it, he already ripped the soft fabric of my skin. He suddenly picked me up and lay me down on the bed that had been mine, but was ours now. He got on top of me after freeing himself from his shirt and thrust his hips to mine to release some of the frustration we both felt.

"Kendall…" I whined desperately. He smiled softly and got up to remove the rest of his clothes and then mine.

"God, Logan. You're gorgeous" He lay on top of me again and kissed me deeply, his hands travelling all over my body, making me melt completely. I moaned loudly when Kendall's hand closed around both of our erections. He smirked and gave an experimental thug, watching my reaction closely and grinning wider when I moaned again. Very loud. As soon as I realized it had been me making all the noise I blushed. Of course I would be loud during sex.

Kendall continued his movement and it didn't take long before I started to pant. Then suddenly his hands were gone. I whimpered softly when the only thing I felt on my dick was cold air. Kendall reached over my head to the nightstand while I tried to catch my breath again.

"You sure about this?" He asked softly. I looked up at him and loving, bright green eyes were looking back at me.

"Yes" He gave me the sweetest, most loving kiss ever before covering three of his fingers in lube and sitting down between my legs. He slowly pushed his middle finger inside of me. It was really awkward and uncomfortable, but didn't really hurt yet. I still tensed up, though.

"You've to relax, sweetie. I don't want to hurt you" He moved his finger around for a minute, before inserting a second one. I hissed. _This_ was painful. Kendall glanced worriedly at me and was about to pull out.

"Don't. Just wait a minute" I said. He smiled, but it wasn't quite a real one. I nodded after a while and he began to move his fingers in and out of me. I was becoming used to this idea of being filled, but still wasn't enjoying it. Really why do people do this? Kendall pushed his third finger in, which would have been really painful, if he didn't brush over something inside of me.

"Kendall!" I yelled, pushing my body down on his fingers, practically fucking myself on them. He smiled and prepared me more willingly now I was actually enjoying it. I screamed when he touched it again. He pulled his fingers out of me, something I didn't like at all. I wanted to feel that again.

Kendall put on a condom and covered it in lube. He lay down on top of me again and positioned his member to my entrance.

"We can still stop. Are you sure?" He asked seriously.

"Do I look like I don't want it?" I growled impatiently. "Just do it already"

He kissed me while slowly pushing inside of me. I totally forgot about the pain and this goddamn hurt as hell. Kendall wasn't even halfway in when I felt the tears rolling down my cheeks.

"You OK?" He asked again. He stopped moving and kept a really close watch on my face.

"Yeah, just hurts a little" I said, blowing it off as nothing.

"Liar. We're stopping" He began to pull out.

I gripped his arms, holding him in place. "No! Just give me a moment. We can't quit now we're this far"

"I'm not going to hurt you" He whispered.

"Then stay. You'll hurt me by stopping now"

"Logan…"

"Just move already!" I wiggled my hips, making him go in deeper. He kissed the tears away and pushed in all the way. He waited for me until I was ready for him to move. He trusted into me slowly and it took him only two to find my prostate.

"FUCK!" I yelled, forgetting about the pain completely and digging my nails in Kendall's back. He moaned softly and pushed into me again. Soon we found a good pace. I became louder and louder every time Kendall hit that place inside of me. He was panting and had his face buried in the crook of my neck.

"Kendall, I'm close" I whispered desperately. I needed to be touched. He seemed to get what I meant and rested his forehead on mine so he could look at me while his hand began to jerk me off in the same pace as his thrusts. I moaned more and made Kendall go fast.

"I'm gonna…"

"Me too, sweetie"

"KENDALL!" I screamed at the same time that Kendall whispered "Logan"

I came all over his chest and hand while he came in the condom. His bright eyes were staring in mine lovingly again.

"I love you" He said after kissing me tenderly.

"I love you too" I was still trying to catch my breath. He pulled out of me slowly and wrapped the condom in toilet paper. He took a new piece and cleaned his chest and hand with it, before throwing it all away. He lay back down next to me and pulled me to his chest.

"How was that?" He asked softly.

"Amazing. Thanks for not stopping" I said tiredly.

"I'm glad I didn't. I love how loud you are, it's a major turn on" He chuckled when I blushed and stroked my back. "Go to sleep, sweetie"

"Kendall?"

"Hmm?"

"I'll never forget this day" After seeing that look on his face, I could have died happy. He was shining brighter than the sun, almost had tears of happiness coming from his eyes. He pulled me incredibly closer. With that, I slept the better than ever before. Lying securely wrapped in Kendall's arms, knowing he loved me more than anything. It was amazing.

**So what did you think? I've only one chapter left for this story, but I already am halfway the sequel… I loved writing this so much I couldn't not continue this story! I really hope you liked this, it's definitely my favorite so far. Review? ^^**


	16. Epilogue

_Three months later_

"You're such a girl, Logan!" Chuckled Carlos when he caught him sniffing the fabric of my shirt he was wearing. James and I just came walking back into the living room with pop corn and a movie for our movie night. The last few months have been so amazing. Logan and I haven't fought once, it was all so perfect. I've never been this happy in my entire life. Being with Logan was even more amazing then I imagined. James and Carlos were still happy together as well and kept growing closer and closer. I sometimes saw them staring into each other's eyes and it was like you caught them having sex or something. I had to look away from them on those moments, it was incredibly intimate.

Logan glared at Carlos. "I'm not a girl! You are!" Now, of course Logan wasn't a girl but even I couldn't help but make that joke every once in a while. James nudged me.

"You wanna make a bet?" He whispered.

"Yeah. Ten on Logan" I whispered back. I had my doubts about this, Logan was always so sweet to everyone I didn't see him hurting Carlos with words, but I also couldn't let him down. What kind of boyfriend was I then?

"Ten on Carlos. Just give me the money already, we both know Logan wouldn't hurt a fly"

"Shh. We'll see about that"

Carlos rolled his eyes. "I am a girl, huh? How?" He asked curiously, but irritated.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you were jumping up and down with excitement when you showed us James' necklace?" He said sarcastically. Two weeks ago, Carlos came running up to us, dragging James along with him and the he had the biggest smile on his face I'd ever seen in my life. Although James was looking a bit sheepish, but seemed pleased with himself none the less for making Carlos that happy. The Latino had showed us the little 'C' on James' necklace and had been beaming for at least a week.

"Oh please! As if you didn't do the exact same thing when Kendall gave you yours!" Carlos fired back. James nodded approvingly and smirked. He was convinced Carlos would win this.

"I actually didn't! I kissed him and didn't even blush!" He stood up from the couch and Carlos followed his example.

"You're so much more of a girl then I am you act like a blushing bride all the time! Why don't you just change gender?" Asked Carlos triumphantly. I hissed and James laughed. He patted my back.

"Maybe, because we only have enough money for one plastic surgery. Your boob job" He said sweetly.

"In your face" I whispered to James. I was extremely proud at Logan for this one. I had no idea he had it in him to make such a move. He stepped closer to Carlos, still with that smile on his face, as if he knew exactly what was about to come.

"Why would I do that?" Squeaked Carlos. "I don't even have boobs!" He crossed his arms in front of his chest defensively.

"Exactly. Don't you wanna give James what he wants?" He cooed. James pulled a face, but didn't smile anymore. He was suddenly watching this very closely, his eyes fixated on Carlos' face to read his expression. Carlos' face turned red and he narrowed his eyes. He took a step closer too.

"I'm so going to win this, James!" I whispered smugly. He huffed.

"Only a girl can be as mean as you are now, Logan" Said Carlos hurt, but not giving up yet.

"Only a girl can be hurt by what I just said" He responded matter-of-factly. He took another step closer, getting face to face with the Latino. He grinned widely, obviously thinking he'd won this argument already. James glared at him. Something I wasn't very happy with.

"You're such a bitch, Logan" Mumbled Carlos, and then smirked. "For Kendall's dick, I mean"

"Yeah, baby!" Shouted James and clapped his hands.

"You take that back, slut" Snapped Logan angrily, his face red with shame and anger.

"I'm a slut, huh?" He asked unbelievably, smirking wider. "I remember that you're the one that's getting fucked!"

"Take that, Kendall! I win!" James did his happy dance and I groaned. It was going to take ages before he would stop bragging about this.

Logan was staring at Carlos as if he had three heads and then did the one thing no one ever expected. He, Logan Mitchell, the pacifist, slapped Carlos in his face. Hard

It was silent for a moment. Carlos grabbed his face and stared at Logan unbelievably. I was pretty impressed by this. "Nice one, sweetie"

At almost the same time James got between him and Carlos and hid the Latino behind his back. He was absolutely livid. "Now, it's on" He hissed and cracked his knuckles.

James fucking Diamond was being protective? Since when was that? I didn't take the time to think about it because he was getting dangerously close to a terrified Logan, who had no idea how to react to this. He walked backwards until the back of his knees hit the couch and he fell on it. That was my sign to get in between them. It's actually a very simple thing to understand. You don't threaten Logan if you want to stay alive.

I caught James fist in mid air. "You should back off now, Diamond" I whispered dangerously.

He pulled away from me. "He's smart enough to think about the consequences before slapping my boyfriend. Now, get out of my way so I can return the favor" Said James furious.

"I don't think so. You're dead if you touch Logan"

"Such a pity, because he's still going to die for slapping Carlos!"

"Logan had every right to! Carlos comment was so mean!" I moved quickly when James tried to sneak past me to get to Logan. I pulled the shorter brunette on his feet and against my back. I held onto him to prevent myself from attacking James.

"Carlos was mean? Did you even listen to what Logan said? Carlos wasn't even half as mean as Logan was!" I took another step back, pulling Logan with me.

"Oh please! As if you didn't find it just as funny as I did!"

"IT ISN'T FUNNY IF IT HURTS CARLOS!" He shouted. Logan whimpered softly and buried his face between my shoulder blades.

"Damn James! Since when did you change into a copy of me?"

"I'm not. I've always been just as protective as you are, just not over every little thing. Get used to it"

"I don't think I have to, seeing as you're going to leave him soon anyway"

I'd never seen James this mad. "Why the hell would I do that?" He whispered softly. No longer focusing on Logan but on me instead. I didn't really care about that. As long as Logan wasn't going to get hurt I was fine with everything.

"You never stay with anyone longer than a month or two. You're too much of a player"

"Maybe this is different? Maybe I really like Carlos a lot? You're going way too far here, Kendall"

"Why would this be different? Besides that Carlos is your best friend? You're just going to end up breaking his heart" I heard a quiet sob coming from the Latino behind James and the pretty boy immediately turned around to hug him. He was staring at me with something I recognized immediately. It was the exact same thing I felt when he was getting in Logan's face.

"I'm not going to break his heart, Knight" He said darkly. I'd never seen James this scary. His eyes narrowed and I was surprised I didn't have a black eye. Carlos smiled a little, but still wasn't fully convinced of that.

"We'll see about that. Just remember you promised not to fuck it up again"

Then James said something that brought back the tears in Carlos' eyes, but not of sadness. "I love him"

With that I backed off. I couldn't say anything if that was true. He had good reason to be mad at Logan. No one liked it if the one you loved got hurt. I knew that all too well.

**Carlos POV**

"You do?" I asked stunned. I didn't want to believe it, afraid it would just be a way to make Kendall back off. I really hoped it was true, I've loved James since the very beginning, but it was way too soon to tell him and I wanted to hear it from him first.

He slowly turned around so he could look at me. From the corner of my eye I could see Logan pulling Kendall away from us, to give us some privacy. I had to remember to thank him later.

James put his hands on my hips and made little circles with his thumbs. He was looking down in my eyes and waited until he heard the door of Kendall and Logan's room shut.

"James, did you really mean it?" I couldn't hide my hopefulness anymore and he chuckled softly.

"Yeah, I think so" He said softly, but his eyes sparkled. "Carlos, I love you"

I'm pretty sure I beamed… Oh well. The most gorgeous person on this planet just told me he loves me so I'm allowed to. "I love you too"

We both leaned in and I'm pretty sure I heard a door squeaking. James groaned.

"We should have known they would eavesdrop" He chuckled before slamming his lips on mine.

Logan was ecstatic. He was so happy about this. He'd been worrying about James breaking Carlos' heart ever since they started dating, since James really is a player, but now he knew it wasn't going to happen. James loved Carlos and the last thing you want to do to the one you love is breaking his heart. You just don't do it. I was happy about it too. I'd forgiven James, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to hit him if he made such a move toward Logan again. I would kill him.

"Calm down, Logie. You knew this would happen sooner or later" I laughed and wrapped my arms around him. There was another reason I was happy about this. Something very important to me. This meant James was finally over his feeling for Logan. That was major progress.

"I didn't. Seriously! I'd been thinking the exact same thing as you, I only didn't have the heart to tell Carlos. I'm extremely happy about this, though" He laid his arms around my neck.

"How happy exactly?" I asked suggestively. I pulled him closer so his chest was touching mine.

"Oh, we're going that way, huh?" He whispered and traced my lips with his finger. I opened my mouth and bit softly on his finger, before sucking on it.

We ended up blowing each other and now Logan was lying naked on my chest, something that happened often after the first time we woke up like that. He still used the excuse that I was a great mattress. I was singing You're Beautiful for him, another thing that happened more and more. Only this time, it went a little different. I reached the last refrain and he started to sing with me. That was a first and I was completely surprised, so I stopped singing.

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful_

_You're beautiful, it's true_

_You must be an angel, with a smile on his face_

…

_And it's time to face the truth_

_I'll always be with you_

"You changed the ending" I said with a voice thick with tears.

"I didn't like it. If it's about you and me we can as well make a good ending on it, right?" He leaned up a bit so he could see my eyes and blushed when he saw how much I loved it. "I love you" He whispered lovingly.

"I love you too, sweetie. So, so much"

**I'm sorry if this was crappy. It really, really is. I hate the ending, but I couldn't bring myself to rewriting it, so here it is. I have the first few chapters of the sequel done, if you want me to post them before I go on vacation to PARIS, please review? Thank you so much for reading!**


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